• February 13, 2012

spaceships

Voters are still vaguely suspicious about the whole “Mormon cult” thing and whether Mitt Romney can be both President and a Mormon. A new Quinnipiac University poll proves that only 45 percent of voters have a positive view of Mormonism, and 36 percent of voters declare themselves “uncomfortable” about electing a Mormon, because Mormons believe [...]

It’s morning in America, for reals this time! The United States has finally honored its favorite sanitation robot that toiled for 800 years cleaning up the Earth after fat slob humans trashed the whole place. That’s right, WALL-E is now on a postage stamp, so that very old people who still pay bills with stamps [...]

We are not always kind to NASA — because come on, most of those people couldn’t even hold a job at the Jiffy Lube — but today’s launch of Discovery went off without a terrible explosion killing everyone aboard. And that’s something, for NASA! Plus, this is the fourth-to-last Space Shuttle mission, ever. No more [...]

Here’s Barack Obama captured in a touching moment of wishing the hell he was somewhere else, maybe piloting a spaceship or eating hamburgers with oceans of dijon or just getting so high on the beach. [White House/Pete Souza]

By the Comics CurmudgeonAre you bored with run-of-the-mill conspiracies? “The Jews did 9/11!” Yawn. “Where’s Obama’s birth certificate?” Snooze. “The Illuminati pull the strings behind the world’s government!” That’s going to be the plot of a major motion picture directed by Ron fucking Howard and scheduled for summer release, my friend. No, to learn the [...]