terrorism
A terrible documentary film called “The Third Jihad,” allegedly bestowed upon the New York Police Department by someone at the Department of Homeland Security, was used to “train” new policepersons, was apparently put “on a continuous loop” at NYPD HQ, and was viewed by nearly 1,500 officers in total during its run, which began in [...]
How are things? Bad? Oh. Well, there’s always “Angry Birds” or whatever. Oxycontin. And the fancy scientist people have moved the “symbolic” Doomsday Clock another minute closer to Midnight. This does not mean “another minute closer to Santa’s visit,” or whatever the popular superstitions are these days. It means the world will come to an [...]
Have you somehow forgotten about Arizona these past few days? Let’s remember it all over again, for the holidays! Nothing says “mythology of the peaceful savior Jesus” like an Arizona gun club hosting a Guns ‘n Santa family foto event. “I thinks it’s going to be all in fun from those who support the second [...]
While #OWS protesters created a “weaponized drum circle” around Michael Bloomberg’s mansion over the weekend, the mayor’s attempt to get people to freak out about the terrorisms was a total failure. Not even the terror-happy federal government was convinced by New York’s lame-o made-up terror suspect. Reuters reports: Federal authorities declined to join the local [...]
A bunch of decrepit rednecks fantasizing about mass murder is a common enough occurrence in North Georgia (your Wonkette bookman knows this from lifelong experience). What’s different about the alleged plot by this AARP IRA is that they had the misfortune to run into an FBI informant who actually challenged them to put their brain-damaged [...]
The Year of Rage is moving along nicely: The four elderly Georgia men arrested for their alleged plot to kill a bunch of federal employees and simultaneously attack a half-dozen cities with poison and some other Rage Batman stuff were all inspired by a Fox News personality’s insanely inspirational novel about killing all the evil [...]
Have you been celebrating the tenth anniversary of the Transportation Security Administration? We sure have! We’ve been doing all kinds of crazy stuff, like feeling up old cripples and making babies take their shoes off and doing the Naked X-Ray on some crying nuns and pouring out little kids’ milk and sticking our hands into [...]
It’s time for the greatest scientific barometer of America’s intellect, the Vanity Fair/CBS News poll of dingbat potpourri questions thrown at a representative sample of Americans who haven’t had their phone lines turned off by Verizon yet. What did our pollsters ask this time? To be weird, instead of asking a series of completely random [...]
What could be wrong about a robot-drone plane raining death and destruction upon the Enemy? Everything, when a Muslim wants to do it! (Otherwise, this is called “10 years of U.S. war in Afghanistan.”) Somehow, the FBI found an angry young Islamic dude in America who was, for some reason, angry about the endless murder [...]
Cuba is Iran’s southernmost province in Palestine and all the terrorists are camping out on Fidel Castro’s front lawn, according to fading pill nut Michele Bachmann, who is here to warn us all that we’d better not re-open trade with Cuba or, GAH, Palestine’s “Hez-BLAH” terrorists will get their U.N. license to bomb Florida, by [...]
Do you remember Oklahoma state Rep. Sally Kern? She just loves those gays, if by “loves” we mean, wants to send them to Gitmo, for terrorism. And since it’s almost the Very Special 10th Anniversary of 9/11 and all, it seems she figured this would be a good time to remind America of her cause, [...]
Anything besides hurricane news today? Yes! The Pentagon or the CIA or whatever corporation runs the robot death drone planes that constantly rain bombs on brown people throughout the world just announced that about a week ago, one of those robot death drone planes dropped a couple of million-dollar bombs somewhere and one of those [...]
Nobody knows what’s really going on in Oslo or at the holiday camp island in Norway where a bombing and a shooting have left many people dead, but it’s always safe for American Idiots on the Internet to jump in with a suspect (“Muslims”) and a verdict (“guilty”) and a list of co-conspirators (“Obama and [...]
We are still trying very hard to ignore this Casey Anthony thing, but it is difficult to do this when it continues to inspire the minds of Americans with abortion jokes and dumb talking points. Oh, in case you managed to escape this horror, Casey Anthony is a lady from Florida who probably murdered her [...]
