Wonkette

A week and a half ago NBC newsman and Meet the Press moderator Tim Russert died, and the earth stopped in its orbit and let out a wild yawp of despair for the most wonderful person who ever lived. Speculation quickly ensued about who would replace Russert in a job that he alone among all living humans was uniquely suited to do: sit in a chair and ask politicians questions. And now we know who will host Meet the Press until the “election,” which will be called off at the last minute when we start bombing Iran. It’s Tom Brokaw! MORE »

We have read this elitist New Yorker profile of your annoying loudmouth boyfriend Keith Olbermann and, like most profiles of MSNBC personalities, it confirms everything you learned about current MSNBC dynamics during the first five minutes of its Iowa caucus coverage. MORE »

While Hillary Clinton remains hidden in a secret Polynesian island bunker, where she drinks single malt scotch and eats artichoke hearts prepared by a cadre of Gypsy slaves all day long, she is still somehow doing her job as a fake Senator. Today she, along with fellow New York Senator Chuck Schumer and some Congressman, introduced an act of legislation to name U.S. Route 20A — in Buffalo — the “Timothy J. Russert Highway.” Because Tim Russert would have done the same thing. MORE »

The saddest part about Tim Russert’s death last Friday was not that he was young. It’s that he never got to stick it to those damn liberal tree-fuckers who don’t want to drill America’s coasts for sweet, sweet Texas Tea! Such was the extrapolation of Rep. Darrell Issa (R-CA) yesterday on the House floor. Do those elite big city fairies think that “Lil’ Russ” liked paying $5 a gallon for gas? He definitely did not! And while we’re at it, how can those Democrats go around killing babies when Tim Russert is also dead? [Think Progress, YouTube]

Oh Tim, you are making everybody feel like a slacker today, when we were already feeling sad. Your last blog thing on MSNBC was posted at 9:50 a.m. Friday, a few hours before you collapsed while doing voiceovers for Sunday’s Meet the Press. You talked about Obama’s new anti-smear team on the Internet, and plugged your Sunday show, which was to feature Obama and McCain surrogates Joe Biden and Lindsey Graham debating each other, which would actually be pretty lame. But still …. [RUSSERT ON POLITICS]

NBC/MSNBC political broadcaster Tim Russert died today at work in Washington, killed by a sudden heart attack. Russert and his family had just returned from a vacation in Italy where they were celebrating the college graduation of son Luke. The VP of News for NBC and head of all Washington operations for the network, Russert joined the company in 1984 after working for Democratic campaigns. He took over Meet the Press in 1991 and won myriad awards for his journalism and books. Good-bye Tim! Election night won’t be the same without you. And now, let’s enjoy a Wonkette/YouTube/Photo tribute to “Lil’ Russ.” MORE »

• OH JESUS CHRIST: “Breaking News 3:23 PM ET: Tim Russert Is Dead of a Heart Attack, His Family Says.” [New York Times]

Here is the most painfully awkward moment in the last two days, where Clinton campaign chairman Terry McAuliffe tells Tim Russert that his father, “Big Russ,” is dead and watching on from Heaven. “Big Russ” is not dead at all. What revenge does the Hillary campaign have planned for MSNBC? Oh right, killing Tim Russert’s father. [YouTube]

Wonkette’s Liz Glover had the opportunity last night to interview Arianna Huffington, founder of Daily Kos or something, about her new book and the nicknames she chooses for Tim Russert. When Liz is waiting for Arianna to sign her a copy of the book, some guy in line says “I know people that work for her,” presumably people who write for the Huffington Post. In other words, this guy knows any human being on earth.

Ha ha, it’s (MS)NBC’s Tim Russert with his hand near his nose, meaning his finger is next to his nose, meaning he is picking his nose. What a sally! He probably eats it while devising cruel yes-or-no questions about Jews. Oh hey, this would be a good place to mention that Ian Schwartz is making videos for us tonight again. Go click on his fantastic website, forever. [Ian Schwartz]