Wonkette

TONY SNOW SURVIVES MYSTERY ILLNESS: Nobody’s saying why ex-White House spokesman and current CNN commentator Tony Snow spent days in a Spokane hospital. But he’s out now, and supposedly doing better, although he still has cancer, but it’s in remission. Good luck, Tony! [KHQ Spokane]

This week, our omnipresent eyes and ears spotted Brit Hume, Jean Schmidt, Tony Snow, Ron Paul, Elvis Costello, Katie Couric, Patrick McHenry, Hillary Clinton, and Tom DeLay, then wrote about spotting them in emails, which they sent to us. And now all those emails are posted after the jump!

See someone sorta famous in DC? Tell us all about it in an email with the subject line “Wonk’d” or “sightings.”

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“WASHINGTON (Reuters) - White House Press Secretary Tony Snow, who has been battling cancer, plans to step down on September 14 and he will be replaced his deputy, Dana Perino, a U.S. official said. ”

Tony Snow, professional liar, is retiring, someday, he claims. In his honor, we are posting the audio clip we first asked about back when he took over the job, more than a year ago. Him singing the theme to Spongebob Squarepants. It’s embedded after the jump! Enjoy! Or not! Whatever!

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Tony Snow was on Hugh Hewitt’s show yesterday, to talk about how the surge is working really well and how we’re going to bomb the shit out of Iran and also how he’s going to retire, some day! Because it’s Friday and not much is happening besides the collapse of the world economy, the collapse of various mines, and the collapse of parts of Peru, the wires all picked it up and reporters asked him about it and he said that yes, he would eventually quit being the Press Secretary, at some unknown date in the future. Why?

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On Monday night, we were convinced to trek down to the National Press Club to see something we haven’t bothered with since high school: a battle of the bands. But this one was different — it had legendary studio guitar wizard Jeff “Skunk” Baxter.

Oh, and Tony Snow and Bob Shieffer.

A gallery of pictures from the lovely Liz Gorman is available right here.

Our brief review is after the jump.

Battle of the Bands Gallery

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Sorry, Dana Perino fans, Tony Snow’s coming back to work on Monday. Sort of? Maybe? MORE »

News website World Net Daily apparently wrote about how Wonkette was mean to Tony Snow, even though Wonkette only wished him a full & speedy recovery. But some of the comments on the post were not so kind. So we’re The Devil or something. What else are they worked up about over at WND? Well, they want to tell you the exciting good news about the upcoming nuclear fucking war!

Check it out, after the nuclear jump.

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Inexplicably powerful Jesus freak leader James Dobson isn’t interested in teevee actor Fred Thompson’s unannounced campaign for the GOP nomination. Why? MORE »

* Senate sounds “the bugle of retreat” by setting “the date certain for surrender” and “mandating failure.” [WP, NYT, LAT]
* Tony Snow isn’t as much of a man as Elizabeth Edwards. [WP, WP, NYT, LAT]
* More like Federal Bureau of Incompetence. [WP, NYT]
* Driven mad with power, Barbara Boxer tries to revive a 1923 equal rights amendment. [WP]
* It sucks to be Dennis Hastert right now. [NYT]
* Military not a fan of the internet, wants l33t hax0rs to shut down terrorist sites. [USAT]
* It’s not just the American people, even other tyrannical world leaders are sick of President Bush. [WP]