Team Wonkette all went to bed last night before the returns from America’s Icebox came in, so they didn’t have time to report the SHOCKING ANTI-INCUMBENT NEWS that hated creep Lisa Murkowski may well be defeated by the immaculately stubbled, Tim James campaign ad-imitating Joe Miller in the Republican primary! Miller is up by 4 [...]
18 percent of Americans — and 31 percent of Republicans — believe Barack Obama is a Muslim. More to the point, the Pew Forum on Religion and Public Life spent good money calling a bunch of people and asking them about this, and then all of your major news outlets get to cluck and say [...]
As part of some big, expensive “diplomatic safari,” Joe Biden’s been chillin’ in Kenya, the birthplace of President Barry Hussein Soetero-Obama. In Nairobi, Biden gave a speech to some university students, telling jokes and complimenting a “beautiful woman” in the audience. Did he show them Obama’s Kenyanese birth certificate?
What are you doing this weekend, average Wonkette reader? Replacing that blow-up sex doll you stabbed mercilessly last weekend? Come on, this is the sixth one, when will you be content with sexing it “normally”? ANYWAY, Barack Obama and family are spending their weekend at Asheville, North Carolina’s luxurious Grove Park Inn Resort & Golf [...]
Hmm, here’s a CRAZY rumor about Glenn Beck and his disappearance this week from Fox News. Nobody ever goes on “actual” vacation in August — except the French, that is — so where the hell is Glenn Beck, really?
What in holy Hell has Mark Sanford been up to? He did NOT go nude tree-humping with a bunch of federally funded nature queers on the Appalachian Trail this weekend; instead, he went to Buenos Aires. Anybody who has left the house thinking they’d like to go on a local nature hike and ended up [...]
Wacky whore & fraud Rod Blagojevich, who was indicted on 16 counts of epic corruption in Chicago yesterday, is currently on vacation at the Florida amusement park Walt Disney World. Oh, and he is with his family. Some local teevee reporter lady got wind of this yesterday and went to his hotel pool area to [...]
Once upon a time when people played poker and they came across somebody who lost very large and predictable amounts at the table, other players would say, “I’d like to get you on a slow boat to China,” so that this loser could continue to shed large amounts of cash for a long period of [...]
The Great Media Sweepstakes of Summer 2008 has a winner! Some lackey pool reporter was lucky enough to spy on Barack Obama’s private family vacation when his shirt was off. This reporter’s sweepstakes prize basket includes $100 in Delaware lottery tickets, a free dessert at Bennigan’s, and a comical CNN Political Ticker write-up to go [...]
Democratic operatives are surprisingly not scared shitless about Obama’s upcoming vacation to Hawaii, despite the party’s well known reputation as shirtless pussies who are always being gay on beaches: “In a piece of footage endlessly recycled to mock his supposed elitism and even foreignness, Mr Kerry was caught on camera windsurfing off Massachusetts. Since Mr [...]
“NEW YORK (Reuters) – Women would rather carpool or go on vacation with Democratic White House hopeful Barack Obama than with his Republican rival John McCain, a new poll of U.S. women voters showed on Tuesday.” What the fuck does this even mean? “Carpooling” and “vacationing” are two very distinct acts. So they have asked [...]
