vampires
When will middle-aged GOP Christian white working-class people embrace the billionaire Mormon elitist Mitt Romney? When teen-aged girls realize Mitt is “just like them,” and not until! That’s why Mittens went on the Today Show to let any teens who already dropped out of high school know that he loves “silly stuff” like the sexy [...]
“Harry Reid isn’t just Dracula, he isn’t just Lazarus, he’s our leader and our whole caucus is thrilled that he’s unbreakable and unbeatable,” he said. Oh thanks, John Kerry — we were worried Harry Reid had pigeonholed himself into the two demographics of vampires and Bible characters. But is Harry Reid just a triceratops? [BBC]
This is special: Asked to name the current chief justice of the Supreme Court, and given four possible names, nearly one-in-ten Americans (8%) choose Thurgood Marshall, despite the fact that Justice Marshall left the Supreme Court roughly 20 years ago, and passed away in 1993. In fact, very few Americans can name the current chief [...]
Somebody tell Charlie Rose to get his ass to Hot Topic: Maureen Dowd wants to make sexytime with a vampire. Imagine, for a moment, that you are M. Dowd. Your journaliturgical home, the New York Times, reaches millions of humans around the world via print and the Internets. Now let us also imagine that it [...]
BREAKING: KAGAN REFUSES TO TAKE POSITION ON MORMON VAMPIRE-WEREWOLF SEXING CONTROVERSY: Your morning editor is too cheap to buy cable and too terrified of spontaneous eye-bleeding to try to seek out the Kagan hearings on the Internets, but hero tipster “WindbagCity” has caught what will surely be the most important exchange of the day: “Amy [...]
South Korea was a simple place, a happy place. Then South Korea was introduced to the Internet, and also Starcraft. And now South Korean people want to kill themselves. [Matt Yglesias] John McCain does not want to be called a trail-blazin’ maverick: “The Spirit of America” will suit him just fine, thank you. [Think Progress] [...]
VAMPIRES ARE A LIBERAL TERRORIST SEX PLOT: Bram Stoker never imagined that his story of a seductive count who necks with young virgins at night might be interpreted as something sexual, but now that dirty-minded liberals have gotten their paws on the vampire story, the terrorists have won. “I’m all for multiculturalism, but this is [...]
