Inflation Reduction Act’s Gonna Make Sure Rich People Pay Their Taxes. What Is This, VENEZUELA?

Now that Darth Garland’s grand inquisitors have raided Donald Trump’s Florida flop house, Republicans are also warning Americans about Emperor Joe Biden’s IRS stormtroopers. Yes, Democrats are amassing an army of 87,000 agents for the Internal Revenue Service, and they’re coming for YOU! an average person who fills out the EZ-BROKE-ASS form.

Marco Rubio, who sounds more like your annoying rightwing brother-in-law than an actual sitting United States senator, tweeted Monday: “After todays (sic) raid on Mar A Lago, what do you think the left plans to use those 87,000 new IRS agents for?"

If you’re wondering what possible connection a legal FBI search could have with a proposed staff increase at the IRS, congratulations, your brain’s not permanently damaged by repeated exposure to Tucker Carlson.

The Republicans’ repeated claim about “87,000 IRS agents” is what those in the fact-checking game would call “bullshit.” Yes, the Inflation Reduction Act, the Democrats’ badass climate, healthcare, and tax package, will provide the IRS with about $78 billon over the next 10 years. That includes a spooky $45.6 billion set aside for “enforcement.”

BUT, as Time reports, the IRS would use the funds to hire an estimated 87,000 employees by 2031. Most of those hires wouldn’t be Internal Revenue agents or even new positions.The IRS isn’t building an army of tax collectors. It’s slowly restoring its staff to where it was a decade ago. During the Trump administration, there was a systemic GOP effort to weaken the agency. Trump himself is a shameless tax evader.

PREVIOUSLY: Hey, We’ve Got Us A Big Climate, Tax, Healthcare Bill. Thanks, Joe Manchin!

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Trump Shuts Damn Mouth For Once

Donald Trump did not talk! Donald Trump shut his fucking mouth! Donald Trump took his lawyer's advice, at least from several years ago!

This has nothing to do with Trump's FBI raid or the criminal investigation in Georgia. It's always confusing, because Trump could end up criminally and/or civilly liable in about 109 different affairs at any given time.

But in New York state, Donald Trump went for his deposition today with New York Attorney General Letitia James, who is leading a civil investigation into the shady ass hinky ass real estate valuations used by the Trump Organization for tax and business purposes, and he pleaded the fucking Fifth.

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Sounds Like Whatever Trump Stole Was Baaaaaaaaaaaaaad

The strangest thing started happening yesterday.

The very legal and very cool search the FBI carried out at Donald Trump's Mar-a-Lago didn't even happen two full days ago, and already the former president's people have abandoned any pretense that investigators wouldn't find anything incriminating there. Now, we all seem to agree that the FBI is going to find some shit in the boxes it took away Monday. And based on what Trump's people are saying, we are guessing whatever the FBI found is extremely bad, like blow your fucking mind bad, like new level of treason we hadn't even imagined yet bad.

VERY LEGAL Good Morning, Donald Trump. Welcome To F*cking Around And Finding Out!

Why? Because suddenly everybody closest to Trump seems to agree the FBI has planted evidence. It's like they're all trying to prepare us for the type of revelation that will lead people to call for the man to be hanged on live television as Super Bowl halftime show entertainment.

Newt Gingrich and Charlie Kirk accused the FBI of it yesterday. Steve Bannon went on an extended verbal meth binge (allegedly!) about how the FBI was preparing to assassinate Trump (no, silly, that's the 87,000 new IRS mathlete paratroopers), and then suggested the FBI was planting evidence.

So far, so bugfuck.

But then Trump's clown college lawyers started getting in on the action, including the former One America News host lawyer who was present for the FBI raid, Christina Bobb. She acted like she was saying she doesn't think the FBI planted evidence, she just thinks they'll lie about what they found, but she's not saying they didn't plant evidence. She also complained that the FBI wouldn't let her watch everything they did.

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After Trump’s FBI Raid Republicans Go All F**k Tha Police

The FBI executed a legal search Monday on Donald Trump’s tacky Florida McMansion. He wasn’t shot in his sleep or anything, but nonetheless Republicans are insisting this is the most disgusting, atrocious thing to ever happen in America. Donald Trump is now Republicans' George Floyd, except for how he’s still alive.

Look, the MAGA faithful even gathered at Trump’s residence for a White Assholes Matter rally. Guys, he’s OK!

Shortly after Trump whined about the FBI’s search, the Republican House Judiciary account tweeted with zero self awareness: "If they can do it to a former President, imagine what they can do to you.” Forced-birth activist Abby Johnson shared a similar sentiment: “If the FBI can go after a President, they can come after any of us.” That’s the whole point of a liberal democracy. The law treats everyone equally, regardless of status.

In a just society, a wealthy, powerful person would see the police brutalizing someone on the street and think, “If they could do that to any human being, they could do that to me.” Instead, most American rightwingers take comfort in a class hierarchy where law enforcement oppresses the marginalized and lets the powerful do whatever the hell they want. That’s their selective definition of freedom.

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Joe Biden Deports Trump's 'Remain In Mexico' Policy

Letting asylum seekers actually seek asylum seems like a good idea.

The US Department of Homeland Security announced this week it will finally end Donald Trump's "Remain in Mexico" policy, after the Supreme Court ruled in June that the administration could go ahead and do so. That means that immigration officials will no longer send immigrants seeking asylum back to Mexico to wait until their asylum cases have been finally decided — which can take years.

Trump put the policy in place in January 2019, fundamentally changing how people were treated when they arrived at ports of entry and asked for asylum, as is their right under US and international law. Instead of allowing these now-legal immigrants to stay in the US while their cases went forward, as had always been the practice, Trump pressured Mexico to accept them while they waited for court dates in the US — and even after a successful initial hearing, the asylum seekers would be sent back to Mexico while the case was adjudicated. Most ended up in dirty, crime-ridden improvised camps, where they were preyed on by cartel kidnappers. About 70,000 people were subjected to that madness under Trump's misrule. The immigrant rights legal group RAICES explains how the program, with the Orwellian name "Migrant Protection Protocol" (MPP), put people fleeing for their lives in even more danger:

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State/Local Politics

Beto Calls A Motherf*cker By Its Name


Beto O'Rourke, who is running for governor of Texas, has committed another aggravated cussing. It's something he does, often in the aftermath of one of our nation's weekly mass shootings, when they happen in Texas. He said a swear because on the Left, among liberals and progressives, people are willing to admit in public that they cuss, as opposed to nervously farting while they say "Let's Go Brandon" and hoping Jesus doesn't hear.

This was a good one, though. Beto was In Mineral Wells, Texas, explaining exactly what happened during the Uvalde, Texas, massacre of 19 children and two teachers, and somebody, according to reports a Greg Abbott supporter, laughed out loud. And perhaps that just wasn't the moment to do that in Beto's earshot, because he quickly said, "it may be funny to you, motherfucker, but it's not to me."

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Scary monsters! Scary monsters!

It's a good morning at Wonkette Manor, with the fine people of Kansas (no, we don't live there) making us feel Extra Way Better About The State Of The World. And because we feel Extra Way Better About The State Of The World, we're not embarrassed to shriek OH NO MONSTERS, or rather, OH NO WE HAVEN'T PAID US IN THREE MONTHS AND ALSO WE'VE BEEN PAYING THE SITE EXPENSES OUT OF POCKET AND OH NO THE HOUSE MONEY IS GONE AND THE CAR MONEY FROM INSURANCE TOTALING OUT OUR PRIUS IS GONE (poor deer) and of course by "us" I mean Shy and me, we would never not pay our staff or freelancers or bills, what are we, THAT LAST SHITHEAD FROM THE WHITE HOUSE? We are not.

So here's the deal. We are not laying anyone off, ever, and we are not reducing our delightful freelancers, ever, so I don't have an OR ELSE to lay on you except "I am going to have to put everything on credit cards again, some more, it's a good thing that last shithead from the White House made me rethink my relationship to debt, i.e., I should have more of it!"

If you are in a financial squeeze with the inflations or the poor, please do not send Wonkette money. If you are already sending Wonkette money, please do not send Wonkette more money (unless you really seriously want to, you are already the attractive ... midshipmen?? in Starship Troopers, DOING YOUR PART). But if you are not in one of the preceding two categories, and you appreciate having Wonkette around and me not dying of MONSTERS, please (PLEASE!) consider starting a recurring donation with the widget below. Click an amount, click "monthly" if you can, and then click "paypal" (paypal) or "stripe" (all credit cards).

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