Ron DeSantis Found Some New Drag Queens To Shake His Weenus At

We guess Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis and his puffy allergy eyes are worried nobody's paying attention to him as he gears up for the 2024 election, so it's time to kick some more drag queens in the teeth.

A few weeks back, when rightwingers spent an entire weekend losing their shit over fake images from an actual family-friendly drag brunch in Dallas, DeSantis got right in on the action, saying bullshit about child endangerment and promising he'd have his people look into what the fascist state of Florida could do to hurt some more LGBTQ+ people. He's already taken so many shits on LGBTQ+ youth, why stop now? Also his War on Mickey Mouse has been going so well.

REALLY! They're Coming For Drag Shows. Really.

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MORE PEEN! Look Away, Kids, The Governor Of Florida Is Shaking His Peener At Mickey Mouse

Now DeSantis has found out about the drag brunches at a place in Miami called the R House, which kids are allowed to attend, presumably with their families, and this has given him another chance to pull his peener out and wiggle it about, for traditional Jesus values. And like the fuckin' Karen he is, he's filed a complaint.


“The nature of the performances [...] particularly when conducted in the presence of young children, corrupts the public morals and outrages the sense of public decency,” the complaint says in an argument accusing R House of disorderly conduct. [...]

The complaint was filed to the Florida Department of Business and Professional Regulation, which is part of the DeSantis administration, by the agency’s Division of Alcoholic Beverages and Tobacco.

What could happen to this place? It could lose its liquor license, since that's the governing authority where DeSantis filed the complaint.

As the Miami Herald explains, this isn't a specifically kid-friendly drag brunch in a specifically LGBTQ establishment. It's more just a really dang popular drag brunch in a Latin-themed restaurant, and like most places that have brunch, children are not barred from entering the premises.

And of course this all started because of some viral video of a scantily clad drag queen from the brunch, posted by that vile piece of trash Brooklyn real estate clown Chaya Raichik, who runs the Libs of TikTok Twitter account, who really needs a goddamned therapist.

DeSantis continued to whine, in his peener-wiggling press conference and his complaint:

“Having kids involved in this is wrong and it is not consistent with our law and policy in the state of Florida, and it is a disturbing trend in our society to try to sexualize these young people,” DeSantis told reporters at a news conference in Tampa. “That is not the way you look out for our children. You protect children. You do not expose them.”

The state argued the “performances and simulated sexual activity — particularly when conducted in the presence of young children — constituted lewd activity and warrants revocation of respondent’s license,” according to the complaint.

Oh, such a big man Ron DeSantis is, shaking that peener at a bar and grill in Miami.

It also believes the place should be “declared a nuisance,” citing precedent set by the Florida Supreme Court that recognizes that “‘men impersonating women’ in the context of ‘suggestive and indecent’ performances constitutes a public nuisance.”

That sounds like precedent established by some real serious judges. Men impersonating women, oh my fucking stars! We will note again for the record that if you think drag shows are sex shows, as so many white conservatives seem to, that's about you and the things that make your Down There bits go tingle-jingle. It's not about the drag show.

If you want to watch the governor demand to speak to the manager about the drag queens and the boobies and the dancing and the lasciviousness of it all, hop over to the Herald. Basically it's just DeSantis grandstanding about things he doesn't understand, like the little boy troll he is.

So that's what's happening with this. Ron DeSantis has found another thing to point his little gubernatorial weenus at in order to make headlines. This comes as DeSantis also announced this week legislation in order to punish "woke CEOs" (LOL). Acting as if he's speaking out for the little guy, he demanded to know, "Do we govern ourselves through our constitution and through our elections or do we have these masters of the universe occupying these commanding heights of society?”

OK, governor. We see it. Now put it back in your fly.

[Miami Herald]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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