35 Reality Shows That Are Totally Fake! Tabs, Fri., May 1, 2020

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Tabs gifs by Martini Ambassador!

Well this is upsetting.

No, this is more upsetting.

Trump wants the spies to find the yellowcake in the Ukraine server at the Wuhan labs. (New York Times)



Spain bleached its beach. Oh Spain. (BBC)

HEY. IDIOTS. DON'T FLUSH YOUR GLOVES DOWN THE TERLET.

What fresh fuckery is this? Oh, just Illinois wanting black people to help white people not be racist at them.

"Tip Your Mask" is in coordination with various police departments in Illinois. When you go into a store or building, you're now asked to "tip your mask" by lowering it slightly so the business owner can see your face. After you tip, you should wash your hands or sanitize as soon as you can.

YOU CAN'T WASH YOUR HANDS AND YOU JUST TOUCHED YOUR FACE AND MASK SO WHITE PEOPLE WOULDN'T THINK YOU WERE MURDERBLACKS ARGHHHHHHH.

Here are one million words about how many Republican senators are in trouble, it is "several of them." — CNN

Maybe Republicans will do even worse as people realize that Republicans don't care about them as they fight for their unemployment benefits Republicans made impossible to get. — Paul Waldman at Washington Post on the bad bureaucracies that hate you and want you to starve.

Republican states signal they could cut off unemployment benefits for people who don't return to work. Yeah, Washington Post, we know.

Here is a good story about a nice family of California strawberry farmers from Mexico, and their dreams for their small acreage. (LA Times)

Here is a good story about a bad meat company called Tyson and how its bad practices helped bring on the possible meat shortages it is now warning about. Also LA Times!

But who will clean Los Angeles's money if coronavirus shuts down the money laundries??? (LAT)

Do you need to explain to an elderly parent why "the Ghanaian barrister who has $3 million in gold for you if you just help him get it out of the country" is not a thing, and your mind can't even begin to process how to explain that because WHAT PART OF THAT DO THEY THINK IS TRUE? This webpage is here to help.

Here, you needed to breathe.

The Pacific Crest Trail in Three Minutes youtu.be

Shrimp salad with lime and mint dressing so hongry now Washington Post.

Okay guys, we're looking at LAKES! And then we're looking at MORE LAKES! Which do you choose? Trick question, you can't.

Which coffee cup does your mom need for Mother's Day? Hillary Clinton Nasty Woman, Elizabeth Warren Liberty, Nancy Pelosi Ride or Die, Kamala Harris, or other? Don't forget to email me all HURRY UP DON'T WAIT TILL WEDNESDAY TO SEND THESE OUT BECAUSE MOTHER'S DAY DUMMY! And I will be like "OKAY!"

Hillary Clinton Nasty Woman

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

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