• IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM THE PUMA BLOG: "Oh, and BTW, Wonkette readers, someday, if you’re lucky, you will live long enough to be old. Your tits will sag, your scrotums will lose their perky tautness and young, stupid adolescent males will make fun of you, unless, of course, the PUMAs make them insignificant. Someday, you may thank us." Jesus, do you type to your mother with those hands? What does this even mean? Our tits (they'll have to be yours by default, Sara, sorry) will get saggy and then adolescent males will make fun of us until PUMA KILLS ALL OF THE ADOLESCENT MALES ON EARTH? These people should be in prison. [Confluence]

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