ROMNEY'S HOT NEW POTBOILER DUE OUT IN MARCH: Smut merchant Mittens "Willard" Romney will publish a sexy new nonfictional work, No Apology: The Case for American Greatness, an unapologetically graphic 304-page how-to guide to Tantric brain-sex with the awesomest nation on earth. Reserve your copy now! [NBC's Newly Redesigned Local News Sites, Which Are So Purty]

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