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HANDSY N.C. STATE SENATOR SHOOTS HOME INTRUDER: This is why we need military-grade assault weapons, people: "TABOR CITY, N.C. -- A sheriff says North Carolina's longest serving state lawmaker has shot one of two intruders who kicked in the front door of his home." This is a real win-win, here, because the senator, R.C. Soles, was able to protect himself with his gun, the news of which has introduced the rest of us to "R.C. Soles," who allegedly has a penchant for teenage cock. [AP ]