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BREAKING: LEVI AND BRISTOL TO PUT THE FINAL NAIL IN THE COFFIN OF HETEROSEXUAL MARRIAGE "Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston say they're engaged and hope to get married within six weeks in Alaska ... Palin and Johnston tell the magazine they reconnected while working out a custody plan and became engaged two weeks ago." Ha ha, there is literally nothing hotter than talking to your dimwit ex about who is required to care for your mistake-baby at what times; it shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone that, when the math and calendaring overwhelmed their feeble brains, they just fell to fuckin'. I bet grandma is psyched! "Representatives for Palin did not immediately return messages from The Associated Press seeking comment." [AP]

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