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Live On ALL CHANNELS, It's The Trump Impeachment! (Liveblog, Day One!)

Who's ready? We are ready!

Soon, the live hearings in the House with Ukraine chargé d'affaires Bill Taylor and State Department official George Kent will start! It will be on ALL THE CHANNELS. In other words, people who usually watch "The View" And "Live With Kelly And Idiot" will see this.

While we're waiting, though, Adam Schiff announced the hearing schedule for next week:

So Friday, we have former ambassador Marie Yovanovitch.

Tuesday, we have Jennifer Williams (from Pence's office!), Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman, Kurt Volker, and Tim Morrison.

Wednesday it's Gordon Sondland, Laura Cooper and David Hale.

And on Thursday, it's former White House Russia adviser Fiona Hill.

Some of those sessions will be split up between "morning session" and "afternoon session" and "sexxxy after dark" session, just kidding, there will be no Impeachment After Dark.

Anyway, we'll be here for all of 'em.

Now let us go make one million cups of coffee and we will do this.

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Is Stephen Miller A White Nationalist? A Head-Scratcher For The Ages!

The Southern Poverty Law Center published what it promises will be the first in a multi-part series of articles examining emails Stephen Miller sent to Dead Breitbart's Home For Plausibly Deniable White Supremacy in 2015 and 2016, when Miller was working for then-Sen. Jeff Sessions and later the Trump campaign. In the emails, Miller pitched story ideas about how dangerous immigrants and minorities are and touted articles from white supremacist websites. He also urged the site to write about In the Camp of the Saints, a notoriously racist 1973 novel that's become hugely popular with white nationalists. (Steve Bannon thought it was much better than Cats, and read it again and again!)

Pope Francis made Miller think of that novel, which depicts Europe being literally invaded by hordes of filthy browns (who in one scene rape a white woman to death). While visiting the US in 2015, Francis called on Congress to treat immigrants with decency. So Miller asked his contact at Breitbart, "[Did] you see the Pope saying west must, in effect, get rid of borders. Someone should point out the parallels to Camp of the Saints." Fact check: Pope Francis never called for the elimination of national borders. But Breitbart published a story (archive link, so as not to pollute your computer) on the eerie parallels between Francis's views and the novel. That author, Julia Hahn, is now an aide to Donald Trump.

The emails were given to the SPLC by former Breitbart writer and editor Katie McHugh, who was shitcanned by Dead Breitbart in 2017 after she sent an anti-Muslim tweet that sounded exactly like 97.4 percent of Breitbart comments. The SPLC says McHugh "has since renounced the far right" (more on that in this Buzzfeed piece), and gosh, we sure hope she's managed to sign up for Obamacare, too. It appears McHugh kept receipts from her time at Breitbart, and shared with the SPLC over 900 Miller emails, sent to her and others at the outlet.

So here's the shocking surprise: Stephen Miller writes like a racist dickhead, and a number of issues that animated his emails have translated into Trump administration policy. The vile stuff Miller said in those emails is already being dismissed by those on the Right, because while it's soaked in white nationalist themes, he never actually uses the n-word, and also he can't be a white nationalist because he's Jewish, didn't you know that? So let's take a look at all the article's evidence showing Stephen Miller can't be a white nationalist, shall we?

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The Ratf*cker's Dilemma

Before shit starts going down today, let's talk about Roger Stone and Donald Trump's shady, shady deal. This afternoon, a jury will decide whether Stone tampered with a witness and lied to Congress about his contacts with Wikileaks during the 2016 election. He didn't take the stand in his own defense, so prosecutors never got to cross examine him about his contacts with the Trump campaign. But they did get Steve Bannon confirming that he spoke to Stone multiple times about upcoming Wikileaks dumps of Hillary Clinton's emails. And they heard Rick Gates testify that Stone relentlessly flogged his connections to Julian Assange from April of 2016.

In late July, Gates was in the car with Donald Trump and two Secret Service agents during a phone call with Roger Stone; Trump turned to Gates and said that Wikileaks was planning further document dumps. All of which was documented in the Mueller Report, but after Bill Barr took a Sharpie to it, conveniently obscuring the firsthand account of Trump's collusion with Wikileaks and Roger Stone, it looked like this.

Why no, that is not what Donald Trump said in his written answers to Mueller's questions.

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Tulsi Gabbard Sends List Of Demands To Hillary Clinton, READ THE TRANSCRIPT!11!!1!!1!1

On Monday, Tulsi Gabbard threw down the gauntlet in the Democratic primary that exists entirely in her mind, in which she is fighting Hillary Clinton to the death either for the Democratic nomination, or maybe for possession of a secret key that grants #InfinityPower to the person lucky enough to possess it. After Gabbard threw down said gauntlet, Hillary reportedly kind of looked at it and immediately went back to reading her book or making chili or giving a speech on children's healthcare, you know, whatever she was doing at the time.

Gabbard has sent Clinton A LETTER. And not just any letter! It is a LIST OF DEMANDS.

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Media/Entertainment

Donald Trump Jr. Now Proud Best-Selling* Author Of Bulk-Purchased Garbage Book

But his father at least knows he's alive now.

Donald Trump Jr., who by the grace of God is the president's son and not yours, has long hoped his father might someday at least pretend to love him. Unfortunately, the president doesn't like losers, which Trump Jr. is. But all is not lost for the self-described "son of a rich white guy living in 2019." Trump Jr. finally achieved some measurable success that didn't involve his father sending him to Las Vegas to learn the casino business. He "wrote" a whiny ode to white male grievances called Triggered: How the Left Thrives on Hate and Wants to Silence Us, and it's just topped the New York Times bestseller list.

This was good enough for a congratulatory tweet from the president -- suitable for framing and prominent display in Trump Jr.'s house.

I hate to rain on this parade of paternal praise, but there is a slight asterisk-shaped catch. It seems that "institutional, special interest, group or bulk purchases" contributed to the book's strong sales. Yeah, if you thought Trump Jr. couldn't give away copies of Triggered, he's proven your liberal ass wrong. So there!

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Impeachment

GOP Lawyer Steve Castor's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

He lawyered THE SHIT outta those witnesses!

House Republican impeachment attorney Steve Castor was given a heaping pile of chicken shit yesterday and failed to turn it into a delicious bowl of chicken salad. Castor's been kicking around the House since 2005, the beloved attack schnauzer of Jason Chaffetz, Trey Gowdy, and Darrell Issa, who described him as "just too good a lawyer not to have." Which might have been overselling it just a wee smidge, particularly since the guy has the charisma of a tube sock.

Donald Trump, a creature conjured entirely out of the fever swamp of reality television, derided the Democrat's counsel Daniel Goldman as a "TV lawyer." And yet Castor's years as a Republican congressional hack proved no match for Goldman's cross examination skills honed as an SDNY mob prosecutor. Sad! Not to put too fine a point on it, Castor got his ass kicked in yesterday's hearing with Bill Taylor, the interim ambassador to Ukraine, and George Kent, the State Department's deputy secretary for European and Eurasian affairs. Which is why the GOP tried to dismiss the entire proceeding as ZZZZZ, OMG SO BORING instead of gleefully playing clips of him PWNING THE LIBS. Because those clips do not exist.

Sick burn!

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foreign policy

Turkish President Visits White House, Doesn't Even Kick One Protester In The Face

Yet.

While most of our attention was focused on the first day of public impeachment hearings yesterday, Donald Trump welcomed to the White House his very good friend Recep Tayyip Erdogan, the strongman president of Turkey. In a press conference that aired shortly after the end of the day's House hearings, Trump said he's a "very big fan" of Erdogan and complained that impeachment "is a sham, and it shouldn't be allowed." Especially because it was happening while his best pal Erdogan was in town. How dare the Democrats ruin the visit of such a fine man!

Well, at least his thugs haven't shitkicked any Americans this time. Yet.

Also, while reading his teleprompter speech about US-Turkey relations, which are the best ever, Trump repeatedly mispronounced his very good friend's funny foreign name, saying "air-da-gahn" instead of "er-do-wan." Real friends don't get too hung up on little details, and only Muslims care about pronunciation, like how Obama exotically said "Paki-stahn" accurately. Republicans know if it doesn't rhyme with "tacky fan," you're probably in thrall to foreigns. Not that they'd use a fruity word like "thrall," either.

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Ukraine

Trump Told Half A Ukrainian Arby's About His Plans To Extort Their President

Bill Taylor told quite a story yesterday!

The first day of the public impeachment hearings is in the books! We will have more thoughts throughout the day on the testimony from Ambassador Bill Taylor and Deputy Assistant Secretary George Kent, but one thing we did not know we were going to hear, early on in fact, was that Bill Taylor has a NEW story for us, something he just found out about last week from one of his staffers, which implicates Donald Trump as the ringleader of his Ukraine crime spree even more than he already was.

The setting for the incident is July 26, the day after the treason call, in a restaurant in Kyiv (which is pronounced KEEV, as we learned yesterday from the Ukraine expert witnesses). Taylor was not present, but staff members were having Ukrainian chicken salad at the Ukraine Bar and Grill with EU Ambassador Gordon Sondland, and Trump called Sondland, or Sondland called Trump, point is they were on the phone:

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lawsplainer

Hey, How's That New Supreme Court Working Out For You?

Hey now hey now don't dream it's over.

On Tuesday, the Supreme Court held oral arguments in a trio of cases about Trump's decision to terminate Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA): Department of Homeland Security (DHS) v. Regents of the University of California, Trump v. NAACP, and McAleenan v. Vidal.

Outside, there were so many pro-DACA demonstrators that police shut down the street in front of the Supreme Court. Inside, the courtroom was packed with Dreamers -- the people who were brought to the US as children, who just about everyone agrees are American and belong here. Just about.

Trump Solicitor General Noel Francisco went up against George W. Bush Solicitor General Theodore Olson and California Solicitor General Michael Mongan as the three argued about whether Trump's decision to terminate DACA was legal.

This case is incredibly important. Roughly 700,000 Dreamers currently have DACA status. DACA allows undocumented people who came to the US as children to live and work here legally, provided they register with the government and meet a number of criteria.

The average DACA recipient came to the US at age three. People who have been working here legally under the program could once again find themselves eligible for deportation.

And right now, Dreamers' chances don't look good.

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2020 democratic primary

Deval Patrick Will Make You Forget All Those Other Dudes

In the future, everyone will run for president for 15 minutes.

Deval Patrick just announced he's running for president as a midseason replacement candidate. You have no idea who he is, but that's not stopping him. He has no compelling or distinguishable platform, but no campaign is perfect (not even highly electable, Donald-Trump-bustin' Joe Biden's). Patrick sees an opening and he's going for it.

Extensive research reveals that Patrick was once governor of Massachusetts. He's the only black person to serve in that role until Ayanna Pressley wins someday. He's a Harvard Law graduate and was assistant attorney general for the Civil Rights Division of the Department of Justice under Bill Clinton. He's no small-town mayor, but he's got chops. Unfortunately, he's running for president in 2007.

Mr. Patrick hopes to bridge the divisions that have shaped the contest so far, appealing to centrists and liberals, white and nonwhite voters and across generational and economic lines in a way none of the candidates have been able to do. A close friend of former President Barack Obama, he has told advisers that he envisions a campaign similar to Mr. Obama's 2008 bid, focusing more on bringing people together and healing the country than making a particular ideological case.

Newsflash, dummies, you can't run Barack Obama's 2008 campaign in 2020. Republicans actually learn something from their failures. Besides, not even Obama could deliver "Purple Rain" again. He won in 2012 with a very solid "Around the World in a Day" campaign. Patrick should fire the political whizzes who told him that not believing in anything will make everyone like you.

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News

Revenge Of The Nerds. Wonkagenda For Thurs., Nov. 14, 2019

'Professional nerds' fight back, another 2020 challenger appears, and AARP hates 'OK, Boomer.' Your morning news brief!

Morning Wonketariat! Here's some of the things we may be talking about today.

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Crime

What's Scarier Than 30-50 Feral Hogs? How About Feral Hogs Stealing Cocaine?

It was in Italy, too, so GLOBALIST feral hogs!

Remember that fine day in August when the daily weirdness of Hell World was disrupted by the weird pro-gun guy who fretted to singer singer/songwriter Jason Isbell that without a trusty semiautomatic bullet hose, he would be unable to protect his children from the "30-50 feral hogs that run into my yard within 3-5 mins while my small kids play?" It was one of the best few hours on Twitter all year.

Which is why it's something of a relief that today, on Impeachment Day One, we're able to tell you that the feral hogs are back, albeit not the same ones, because they're in Italy, not in any American's yard, and we don't have an exact count. Thirty to fifty seems as good a guess as any.

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News

Live On ALL CHANNELS, It's The Trump Impeachment! (Liveblog, Day One!)

Bill Taylor, George Kent, YOU'RE UP.

Who's ready? We are ready!

Soon, the live hearings in the House with Ukraine chargé d'affaires Bill Taylor and State Department official George Kent will start! It will be on ALL THE CHANNELS. In other words, people who usually watch "The View" And "Live With Kelly And Idiot" will see this.

While we're waiting, though, Adam Schiff announced the hearing schedule for next week:

So Friday, we have former ambassador Marie Yovanovitch.

Tuesday, we have Jennifer Williams (from Pence's office!), Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman, Kurt Volker, and Tim Morrison.

Wednesday it's Gordon Sondland, Laura Cooper and David Hale.

And on Thursday, it's former White House Russia adviser Fiona Hill.

Some of those sessions will be split up between "morning session" and "afternoon session" and "sexxxy after dark" session, just kidding, there will be no Impeachment After Dark.

Anyway, we'll be here for all of 'em.

Now let us go make one million cups of coffee and we will do this.

Keep reading... Show less
White House

Is Stephen Miller A White Nationalist? A Head-Scratcher For The Ages!

(Yes.)

The Southern Poverty Law Center published what it promises will be the first in a multi-part series of articles examining emails Stephen Miller sent to Dead Breitbart's Home For Plausibly Deniable White Supremacy in 2015 and 2016, when Miller was working for then-Sen. Jeff Sessions and later the Trump campaign. In the emails, Miller pitched story ideas about how dangerous immigrants and minorities are and touted articles from white supremacist websites. He also urged the site to write about In the Camp of the Saints, a notoriously racist 1973 novel that's become hugely popular with white nationalists. (Steve Bannon thought it was much better than Cats, and read it again and again!)

Pope Francis made Miller think of that novel, which depicts Europe being literally invaded by hordes of filthy browns (who in one scene rape a white woman to death). While visiting the US in 2015, Francis called on Congress to treat immigrants with decency. So Miller asked his contact at Breitbart, "[Did] you see the Pope saying west must, in effect, get rid of borders. Someone should point out the parallels to Camp of the Saints." Fact check: Pope Francis never called for the elimination of national borders. But Breitbart published a story (archive link, so as not to pollute your computer) on the eerie parallels between Francis's views and the novel. That author, Julia Hahn, is now an aide to Donald Trump.

The emails were given to the SPLC by former Breitbart writer and editor Katie McHugh, who was shitcanned by Dead Breitbart in 2017 after she sent an anti-Muslim tweet that sounded exactly like 97.4 percent of Breitbart comments. The SPLC says McHugh "has since renounced the far right" (more on that in this Buzzfeed piece), and gosh, we sure hope she's managed to sign up for Obamacare, too. It appears McHugh kept receipts from her time at Breitbart, and shared with the SPLC over 900 Miller emails, sent to her and others at the outlet.

So here's the shocking surprise: Stephen Miller writes like a racist dickhead, and a number of issues that animated his emails have translated into Trump administration policy. The vile stuff Miller said in those emails is already being dismissed by those on the Right, because while it's soaked in white nationalist themes, he never actually uses the n-word, and also he can't be a white nationalist because he's Jewish, didn't you know that? So let's take a look at all the article's evidence showing Stephen Miller can't be a white nationalist, shall we?

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2016 Presidential Election

The Ratf*cker's Dilemma

And speaking of quid pro quos ...

Before shit starts going down today, let's talk about Roger Stone and Donald Trump's shady, shady deal. This afternoon, a jury will decide whether Stone tampered with a witness and lied to Congress about his contacts with Wikileaks during the 2016 election. He didn't take the stand in his own defense, so prosecutors never got to cross examine him about his contacts with the Trump campaign. But they did get Steve Bannon confirming that he spoke to Stone multiple times about upcoming Wikileaks dumps of Hillary Clinton's emails. And they heard Rick Gates testify that Stone relentlessly flogged his connections to Julian Assange from April of 2016.

In late July, Gates was in the car with Donald Trump and two Secret Service agents during a phone call with Roger Stone; Trump turned to Gates and said that Wikileaks was planning further document dumps. All of which was documented in the Mueller Report, but after Bill Barr took a Sharpie to it, conveniently obscuring the firsthand account of Trump's collusion with Wikileaks and Roger Stone, it looked like this.

Why no, that is not what Donald Trump said in his written answers to Mueller's questions.

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News

Impeachment Day! Wonkagenda For Wed., Nov. 13, 2019

Impeachment Day, the 2020 horse race, and Trump grifters. Your morning news brief!

Happy Impeachment Day, Wonketariat! Here's some of the things we may be talking about today!

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Impeachment

It's Impeachment-Eve-Thirty, Motherf*ckers! Let's Remember What Trump's Ukraine Scandal Is Really All About.

Missed some Ukraine stories and need to catch up? WONKETTE GOT YOU.

Welcome to Impeachment Eve! Or, you know, the first of many Impeachment Eves.

Tomorrow is the first public impeachment hearing in the House, and the guests of honor will be (acting) ambassador to Ukraine Bill Taylor and State Department official George Kent, two people whose testimonies behind closed doors were devastating to Donald Trump. The hearings start at 10 a.m. Eastern, which is "time" where you live, it will be aired on all the channels and all the internets, and yes, we will be FUCK IT, WE'LL DO IT LIVE-ing here at Wonkette, which is another word for "liveblogging."

Last night, Rachel Maddow started off her show with an "A" block that we think really captured what this impeachment is all about. As complicated as certain details have gotten, remember that the central crime has remained simple: Donald Trump abused the power of his office for personal gain by extorting a country to manufacture fake dirt to help him win the 2020 election, and also to legitimize his 2016 "win," while threatening to withhold military aid they desperately need to survive their war with Russia, Trump's BFF who invaded them.

That's it. Memorize that sentence if you want to. Set it to music! CHOREOGRAPH A JIG!

It's not "allegedly." He did it. Everybody who has testified says he did it. The original whistleblower complaint says he did it. His READ THE TRANSDFRIPT!!11!21! says he did it. Mick Mulvaney says he did it. His confessions say he did it.

And oh yeah, tomorrow's all-stars Bill Taylor and George Kent sure as hell say he did it, as does Marie Yovanovitch, the ambassador who got fired because she was in the way of Trump doing it, who will be testifying in public on Friday.

Game over. Get the un-American fucker out of office already.

BUT IN CASE YOU HAVE MISSED SOME STUFF, LET'S CATCH UP!

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Featured

Roger Stone Charms Jury By Staying Off Witness Stand

Even a blind squirrel is right twice a day.

If Donald Trump's campaign was really doing NO COLLUSION with Russia, it sure as hell wasn't for lack of trying. Testimony from Steve Bannon and Rick Gates conclusively establishes that the Trump campaign believed they were working with Wikileaks through Roger Stone to get the stolen DNC emails released.

Maybe Roger Stone was lying about having a conduit to Wikileaks, although he and that loon Jerome Corsi correctly "predicted" that it would soon be John Podesta's "time in the barrel." And perhaps the Trump campaign didn't realize that Kremlin-backed hackers had broken into the DNC server. Although Rick Gates testified that just days before his famous plea for Hillary Clinton's emails, "Russia, if you're listening," Trump hung up the phone after speaking to Roger Stone and announced that Wikileaks was going to dump more stolen Clinton dirt.

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Impeachment

Fed Society Founder Steve Calabresi Was A Dick But He Was Smart. The Daily Caller Ruined That Too

Jamie used to respect this guy, her old professor. His thoughts on 'Constitution' and 'impeachment' are YIKES.

If we wrote about it every time the Daily Caller published bootlicking bullshit with no legal or factual basis, we wouldn't have time to do anything else. But this isn't just your typical Daily Caller drivel. It was "written" (allegedly) by none other than Steven Calabresi, one of the founders of the Federalist Society. And it is one of the dumbest things I have ever read.

It's bad. It's really bad. It's bad even for 2019. It's bad even for a defense of Donald Trump. I might even go as far as to say it's bad even for the Daily Caller, and the fact that that's even a possibility should tell you how bad it really is.

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2020 democratic primary

Democratic Establishment Wondering Just How Stuck They Are With Joe Biden

If the tag's still attached, then they have options.

People -- well, mostly white dudes -- like to claim that Hillary Clinton was a sucktastic candidate. However, there's a reason her only serious competition in 2016 was the socialist. It wasn't because the DNC "cleared the field" for Queen Hillary's coronation. People just didn't want to get their asses beat.

It's quite a different primary race this time. So many Democrats are running it's hard to notice when they drop out. It's like raking leaves. They still keep piling up. Joe Biden is the mostly undisputed frontrunner, and that excites no one, not even his wife. He was the non-threatening choice, perfectly capable of defeating Donald Trump with his high-octane electability. But according to a recent article in the New York Times, the "movers and shakers" in the party are having second thoughts. Maybe they finally Googled "Joe Biden." Regardless, according to the Times, they're asking themselves, "Is there anybody else?"

New York Times

Please stop already with the "Michelle Obama for president" nonsense. Michelle and Barack are out there living their best lives. She's not giving that up to become anyone's personal Oprah. There's an actual black woman already running in this primary. Support her.

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