Inflation Reduction Act’s Gonna Make Sure Rich People Pay Their Taxes. What Is This, VENEZUELA?

Now that Darth Garland’s grand inquisitors have raided Donald Trump’s Florida flop house, Republicans are also warning Americans about Emperor Joe Biden’s IRS stormtroopers. Yes, Democrats are amassing an army of 87,000 agents for the Internal Revenue Service, and they’re coming for YOU! an average person who fills out the EZ-BROKE-ASS form.

Marco Rubio, who sounds more like your annoying rightwing brother-in-law than an actual sitting United States senator, tweeted Monday: “After todays (sic) raid on Mar A Lago, what do you think the left plans to use those 87,000 new IRS agents for?"



If you’re wondering what possible connection a legal FBI search could have with a proposed staff increase at the IRS, congratulations, your brain’s not permanently damaged by repeated exposure to Tucker Carlson.

The Republicans’ repeated claim about “87,000 IRS agents” is what those in the fact-checking game would call “bullshit.” Yes, the Inflation Reduction Act, the Democrats’ badass climate, healthcare, and tax package, will provide the IRS with about $78 billon over the next 10 years. That includes a spooky $45.6 billion set aside for “enforcement.”

BUT, as Time reports, the IRS would use the funds to hire an estimated 87,000 employees by 2031. Most of those hires wouldn’t be Internal Revenue agents or even new positions.The IRS isn’t building an army of tax collectors. It’s slowly restoring its staff to where it was a decade ago. During the Trump administration, there was a systemic GOP effort to weaken the agency. Trump himself is a shameless tax evader.

PREVIOUSLY: Hey, We’ve Got Us A Big Climate, Tax, Healthcare Bill. Thanks, Joe Manchin!

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Trump Shuts Damn Mouth For Once

Donald Trump did not talk! Donald Trump shut his fucking mouth! Donald Trump took his lawyer's advice, at least from several years ago!



This has nothing to do with Trump's FBI raid or the criminal investigation in Georgia. It's always confusing, because Trump could end up criminally and/or civilly liable in about 109 different affairs at any given time.

But in New York state, Donald Trump went for his deposition today with New York Attorney General Letitia James, who is leading a civil investigation into the shady ass hinky ass real estate valuations used by the Trump Organization for tax and business purposes, and he pleaded the fucking Fifth.

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Sounds Like Whatever Trump Stole Was Baaaaaaaaaaaaaad

The strangest thing started happening yesterday.

The very legal and very cool search the FBI carried out at Donald Trump's Mar-a-Lago didn't even happen two full days ago, and already the former president's people have abandoned any pretense that investigators wouldn't find anything incriminating there. Now, we all seem to agree that the FBI is going to find some shit in the boxes it took away Monday. And based on what Trump's people are saying, we are guessing whatever the FBI found is extremely bad, like blow your fucking mind bad, like new level of treason we hadn't even imagined yet bad.

VERY LEGAL Good Morning, Donald Trump. Welcome To F*cking Around And Finding Out!

Why? Because suddenly everybody closest to Trump seems to agree the FBI has planted evidence. It's like they're all trying to prepare us for the type of revelation that will lead people to call for the man to be hanged on live television as Super Bowl halftime show entertainment.

Newt Gingrich and Charlie Kirk accused the FBI of it yesterday. Steve Bannon went on an extended verbal meth binge (allegedly!) about how the FBI was preparing to assassinate Trump (no, silly, that's the 87,000 new IRS mathlete paratroopers), and then suggested the FBI was planting evidence.

So far, so bugfuck.

But then Trump's clown college lawyers started getting in on the action, including the former One America News host lawyer who was present for the FBI raid, Christina Bobb. She acted like she was saying she doesn't think the FBI planted evidence, she just thinks they'll lie about what they found, but she's not saying they didn't plant evidence. She also complained that the FBI wouldn't let her watch everything they did.

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After Trump’s FBI Raid Republicans Go All F**k Tha Police

The FBI executed a legal search Monday on Donald Trump’s tacky Florida McMansion. He wasn’t shot in his sleep or anything, but nonetheless Republicans are insisting this is the most disgusting, atrocious thing to ever happen in America. Donald Trump is now Republicans' George Floyd, except for how he’s still alive.

Look, the MAGA faithful even gathered at Trump’s residence for a White Assholes Matter rally. Guys, he’s OK!


Shortly after Trump whined about the FBI’s search, the Republican House Judiciary account tweeted with zero self awareness: "If they can do it to a former President, imagine what they can do to you.” Forced-birth activist Abby Johnson shared a similar sentiment: “If the FBI can go after a President, they can come after any of us.” That’s the whole point of a liberal democracy. The law treats everyone equally, regardless of status.

In a just society, a wealthy, powerful person would see the police brutalizing someone on the street and think, “If they could do that to any human being, they could do that to me.” Instead, most American rightwingers take comfort in a class hierarchy where law enforcement oppresses the marginalized and lets the powerful do whatever the hell they want. That’s their selective definition of freedom.

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Right Wing Extremism

Anti-Abortion Utah Councilman Knows Placenta Facts. You Think You Know Placenta Facts? Wrong.

And they say anti-abortion dipshits are bad at science.

It is about time we had some goddamned science around here and Salt Lake County, Utah, Councilman Dave Alvord is here to provide it.

Vice President Kamala Harris made a statement a few days ago about women and their "own bodies" and Mr. Alvord cleared his throat, cracked his knuckles, and mansplained:


"The baby is not part of the body of a woman," said Dave.

He could have stopped there and perhaps have had some kind of tenuous but vaguely arguable point about a fetus not being technically part of its host. Of course he would lose that argument, because we'd just say "Fine, let the little motherfucker get a job and get its own apartment, we'll see how much of a so-called person that fetus really is. Stupid fetus, disrespectful little shit." Yep, that's what we'd say.

But Dave Alvord was not deterred. "The umbilical chord and placenta do not directly connect to the woman." WHAT? "The baby floats inside the woman." WHAT WHAT WHAT? Does fetus float in uterus like spaceman doing 360s reaching for baloney rolls and pieces of Jell-O in a rocket ship? IS FETUS CONNECTED TO HOST LIKE BLUETOOTH?

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energy

Study: As Coal Plants Close, Local Clean Energy Jobs Could Employ All Their Workers

DAMN YOU HILLARY CLINTON, we're sure.

A new study from researchers at the University of Michigan offers an encouraging scenario for the shift to a clean energy economy. If wind and solar power installations are located within 50 miles of the coal-fired power plants that will need to be closed, clean energy could fully replace the jobs that would be lost when the coal plants shut down. Locating new wind and solar near closing coal plants would add some costs to the overall national energy transition, since some coal plants aren't in ideal locations for wind or solar power, but as the study puts it, the increased costs are "modest relative to overall energy transition costs." Plus, there's that benefit of providing jobs and economic stability in communities where the coal plant used to be a major employer.

As you might recall, a few weeks ago, Joe Biden spoke about the clean energy transition at the site of a retired coal plant in Somerset, Massachusetts. That plant was converted into a factory to manufacture transmission cables to be used for offshore wind farms. Once a planned wind farm in the area is up and running, its power output will go through those cables into nearby electric infrastructure that used to carry power generated by the coal plant. The U of Michigan study makes clear that sort of transition can be managed all across the country, even if you don't have an ocean handy.

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Trump

By The Pricking Of Our Thumbs, Something Treason This Way Comes? Allegedly!

What did we say two days ago? We'll tell you what we said two days ago.

Let's hop in the Wonkette Two Days Ago Time Machine (it's a very cheap time machine) and see what we were saying. Probably something about farts.

[B]ased on what Trump's people are saying, we are guessing whatever the FBI found is extremely bad, like blow your fucking mind bad, like new level of treason we hadn't even imagined yet bad.

Why? Because suddenly everybody closest to Trump seems to agree the FBI has planted evidence. It's like they're all trying to prepare us for the type of revelation that will lead people to call for the man to be hanged on live television as Super Bowl halftime show entertainment.

And that's just scratching the surface of what Trump, his lawyers, and his allies are saying.

But whether it's the omnipresent lie about the FBI planting evidence, or saying that Joe Biden's 87,000 new special forces IRS SEAL teams are going to KILL YOU (Brian Kilmeade did that last night), or rebranding the FBI as the Gestapo, or suggesting the Deep State is about to assassinate Trump — all to protect a really sickly turd that accidentally got misidentified as a human baby back in the early 1940s — it is a level of hysteria that only makes sense if they are desperately trying to get us to LOOK OVER THERE, presumably away from what we described as what might be a new level of treason previously unimaginable, something that would reasonably make the average American curious if public executions during Super Bowl halftime were too déclassé, or should we do it during "The Voice" or something.

Last night, the Washington Post came out with this scoop:

Classified documents relating to nuclear weapons were among the items FBI agents sought in a search of former president Donald Trump’s Florida residence on Monday, according to people familiar with the investigation.

Oh. Ohhhhhhhh.

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