Trump Sure Doesn't Want 1/6 Committee To See His Presidential Records! A Live Blog!

This morning the DC Circuit will hear Donald Trump's appeal of a DC District judge's refusal to stop the National Archives from releasing records to the January 6 Select Committee. I will liveblog it for you, so, fingers crossed that Team Trump delivers its usual high-caliber hijinks.

Three weeks ago, Judge Tanya Chutkan dick kicked Trump's request to enjoin the Archives from releasing his records. Apparently the court failed to see the logic behind his lawyers' argument that the former president's claim of executive privilege counts more than the sitting president's waiver. Then she dick kicked him again when he demanded that she stay her own order.

But the appeals court hopped in and did Trump a solid and put the order on hold. Only it was a very tiny solid, since they set a blistering schedule, forcing the lawyers to submit their briefs in rapid fashion and argue the appeal TODAY.

Keep reading... Show less

Some Insufficient Words About Stephen Sondheim

Stephen Sondheim died Sunday. Describing him as a “composer," “lyricist" or even an “American musical theatre legend" feels too limiting, like calling Shakespeare a guy who wrote plays, and Sondheim is very much the 20th Century Shakespeare, a visionary who revolutionized an art form. This would've been true if Sondheim had died from his heart attack at 49, but he lived to 91 and was only more innovative in his later years.

I'm neither qualified nor emotionally ready to articulate Sondheim's place in history. I can only discuss what he means to me, if you'll forgive the indulgence.

I clearly recall the first time I heard a Sondheim song. Yes, this makes me incredibly middle-aged, but I watched the first-ever broadcast of the Fox network on April 5, 1987. There were two airings that night of the pilots for "Married ... with Children" and "The Tracey Ullman Show." During the first Ullman sketch, “The Makeover," she sings Sondheim's “I Feel Pretty" in front of a mirror. (Music by Leonard Bernstein.)

Keep reading... Show less

You Bought Nothing Yesterday. Now It's Time To WONKETTE BAZAAR!

You have a loved one who LURVES YOUR WONKETTE. Buy them some shit straight from our basement! Nota bene: We are shutting down our basement factory right after Christmas, so if you wanted some presents from us anytime in the first half of the year, please to buy it ahead of time, hide it in your garage, and then forget not only where you hid it, but also what you bought. Now you are a Schoenkopf, you lucky bastard you.

Keep reading... Show less

(PSSST *Grandma* Wonkette's Pineapple Orange Cranberry Sauce Is Better, Actually)

For years now — seven at least, suckers — we have been making Aunt Wonkette's Real Cranberry Business. It's great! (Needs more sugar. Not Oprah-level four damn cups, but one would be nice.) But last year, we did not do that. We wanted pineapple, which we almost always have on hand ever since your comrade Vegan & Peeara or whatever she is named these days told us while we visited her in Charleston that pineapples are symbols of hospitality.

So fuck it, we did it live!

Keep reading... Show less
Conspiracy theories

Nancy Pelosi Buying Up Double Fridges In South Florida To Store Her Luxury Ice Creams, Probably

Or you know, not.

If you spent your Thanksgiving sucking at the bowels of the rightwing internet, you were privy to some BIG MAJOR NEWS. No, not the thing about how Kamala Harris bought a nice pot in France. (It's true! Kamala Harris, the vice president, was in France, and while there she bought a nice piece of cookware. And highly paid professional wingnuts melted down pretending they were common peasants with no idea what decent cookware costs and that Harris is literally Marie Antoinette.)

We are talking about the story of the REAL (not real) Marie Antoinette, whose name is Nancy Pelosi. This was worse (not worse) than when Princess Cookies 'n' Cream Vanderbilt Rothschild Pelosi revealed she has a double fridge with deluxe ice creams in it.

The story was that Nancy Pelosi had bought a $25 million home in Jupiter Island, Florida. WHOA IF TRUE! Except it wasn't true, it was just rightwing Twitter bullshit, that thing where they all make up a story together and agree to believe it, like QAnon or Reaganomics.

The Bulwark does the best job we've seen of explaining how this started in certain fever armpits of the American Right on Twitter and immediately traveled to all the other fever armpits of the American Right on Twitter, like those belonging to Sean Hannity. Why would this story get all the wingnuts' legs kicking involuntarily, like Pomeranians getting their bellies scratched?

The lib-owning idea went something like this: Nancy Pelosi and her ilk have overreacted to COVID-19 at every turn. Ron DeSantis is a freedom loving governor of the greatest state in America. And now Pelosi was all but admitting that DeSantis was right by spending $25 million on Florida real estate. What an elitist hypocrite!

Okeydoke. We could note that if somebody is buying a $25 million property on Hobe Sound in Jupiter Island, they're really not having to subject themselves to very much "Florida," but that would be tacky of us to say.

And anyway, the story isn't true.

Keep reading... Show less
January 6

Hey, Merrick Garland, Here’s Some More Evidence Of Trump’s January 6 Coup Plotting If You’re Interested

DOJ appears frozen in norms.

More details have emerged about how desperate Donald Trump was to stop Congress from certifying Joe Biden’s election win on January 6. Once-loyal lapdog Mike Pence wouldn’t go along with Trump's Constitution-shredding plan to unilaterally reject electors from states Trump lost like a loser, but Trump continued plotting with his loyal stooges at the Willard hotel in Washington DC over how they could overturn the election results.

The Guardian reports:

But as Trump relayed to them the situation with Pence, he pressed his lieutenants about how to stop Biden’s certification from taking place on 6 January, and delay the certification process to get alternate slates of electors for Trump sent to Congress.

Again, for the record, there were no legal “alternate slates of electors for Trump” from the states Biden won decisively. Trump’s plan here was to overrule the voters and steal a second term. Several Trump lawyers reportedly insist that they "only considered delaying Biden’s certification at the request of state legislators because of voter fraud,” but the Trump campaign’s claims of voter fraud were repeatedly rejected and laughed out of court.

However, what really matters here is motive and intent. Trump was delusional enough to believe that stopping the electoral vote count would help him hold onto power. The objective was to delay, delay, delay, and what could’ve been more conducive to that goal than a MAGA mob storming the Capitol?

Keep reading... Show less

Yay! Probably No Government Shutdown Coming! Now, About  Debt Limit And Build Back Better...

Such a busy December coming!

Time for another Government Funding Showdown, since the federal government will run out of funding authority at the end of Friday. If this sounds awfully familiar, it's because we just had another Looming Government Shutdown on our hands back at the end of September, closely followed by a Looming Debt Crisis. Both of those problems were resolved with temporary bills, but only for a short time, so here we are again: Whole lotta looming going on.

The good news is that pretty much all media sources report that congressional sources are "confident" that another short-term funding measure — our friend the "continuing resolution," which keeps spending going temporarily — can be worked out before Friday, so we aren't likely to see any "Closed" signs on national parks, government offices, or Marjorie Taylor Greene's mouth. (Haha, we are joking, it runs constantly like a diesel truck, and also spews toxic garbage.)

The not so great news is that once a continuing resolution is taken care of, the real nail-biting will begin over the stupid fucking useless debt ceiling and over passing Joe Biden's Build Back Better agenda in the Senate. There again, there's reason for hope, but the actual getting there is likely to be exhausting.

Keep reading... Show less

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)