Kraken Lawyers Forced To Pay Back Taxpayers For Legal Bills In Crap Election Suits

Sidney Powell was told there would be no math. Or if there was math, it would be confined to wholly fantastical numbers made up by her own expert witnesses, not a detailed accounting of what it cost taxpayers to fend off her garbage Kraken lawsuits.

But those nerds in Detroit and the Michigan statehouse just had to brown nose it. They turned in an actual accounting of their time spent protecting democracy after US District Judge Linda V. Parker told Powell and the derp squad to cough it up for spamming the docket with bogus affidavits and prolonging their attempt to overturn the election after the electoral votes were certified on January 6 — despite the best efforts of people who believed Powell's Big Lie to put a stop to it.

So now Our Sid and her lawyer are asking the judge not to be so literal about those numbers.

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Susan Collins Opposes Abortion Rights Bill Based On Thing She Totally Made Up

In case you hadn't noticed, reproductive rights are not long for this world. At least in this country. At least in states where those in charge just really, really, really want to force people to give birth against their will. In an attempt to fight this encroachment on our liberty, Democrats are once again pushing to pass the Women's Health Protection Act, authored by Sen. Richard Blumenthal of Connecticut, which would codify Roe into law and ensure that abortion rights are protected for everyone in this country, regardless of where they happen to live.

The House bill, sponsored by Judy Chu with 48 Democratic co-sponsors, is expected to be approved on Friday, and would legalize abortion in all states up until fetal viability (when a fetus can survive outside the uterus) and prevent states from enacting laws restricting or banning the procedure.

Now, you would think that Susan Collins, one of the two remaining pro-choice Republican senators, someone who very much claims to care deeply for reproductive rights even as she signed off on Brett freaking Kavanaugh, would agree to vote to save reproductive rights from state-level sabotage. You would be wrong. She says she will vote against it. In an interview with the LA Times, Collins explained her reasoning.

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Joe Biden Thinks Trump Is 'F*cking A**hole,' Is Correct

People who have been reading Wonkette for at least a week might remember last week when we examined whether Bob Woodward is sometimes full of shit, based on some reporting in his new book that seems like it might not be quiiiiiite right. Examining all the evidence, we made an educated guess that Woodward is an excellent reporter for the part of reporting that is "has all the sources," but occasionally he fails to grasp the overall meaning and/or tone of the words he is reporting on, which once in a while makes the end product come out just ... off.

That said, we don't think there are many ways to misinterpret "what a fucking asshole," so we're gonna guess Woodward's and Robert Costa's book is right when it says Joe Biden looked at the stinky gauche crap Donald Trump left all over the White House — NO, WE DON'T MEAN TRUMP LOCKED HIS TWO OLDEST SONS IN THERE BY ACCIDENT — and his reaction was "what a fucking asshole." That does sound like Joe.

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Fox News Idiot Wishes Biden Didn't Constantly Ride Bike Like Old Sad Frail Dead Bike Riding Person

Hey, does everybody remember Donald Trump's theory of exercise? Namely, that you shouldn't do it, because it will deplete your body of all its energy and resources and kill you?

We always have to wonder just how brainwashed his sycophantic followers really are these days, how far they're really willing to follow him, which cliffs they're willing to hurl their bodies off of to prove their allegiance. But we do know that one of the many, many Fox News idiots, Rachel Campos-Duffy, was reporting on President Joe and First Lady Dr. Jill Biden taking a bike ride in Rehoboth Beach, Delaware, this weekend, and decided to lob some zingers in the president's direction. You know, because he was exercising. Like an old person. Exercising. What a senior citizen. On a bike. Like an old dead person.

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Everywhere Else News

Switzerland Gets With The Times Of Several Years Ago, Votes To Legalize Same Sex Marriage

We'd say congratulations in Swiss, but turns out that's not a language.

Here in America, we are so used to Europe being so extremely far ahead of us socially and economically that we sometimes forget that not every country is ideal in all areas. For instance! Ireland like, just legalized abortion a few years ago, and Switzerland is now just getting around to legalizing same sex-marriage.

Although the country has had "civil unions" since 2007, they did not confer all of the same rights as "marriage." Specifically, they did not allow couples to adopt, allow lesbians access to sperm banks, and will make it just as easy for their partners to become Swiss citizens as it is for heterosexual couples.

The government actually approved legislation to make same-sex marriage legal last year, but anti-LGBTQ bigots collected enough signatures to push for a voter referendum. Alas, they failed — 64 percent of voters voted in favor of legalization. It's not a great percentage, but it's a majority. It's also likely to improve, once weirdos realize that their own marriages don't suddenly feel less special. We've hit 70 percent approval this year, which is an all time high for us.

Via New York Times:

"It is clearly discrimination based on sexual orientation," said Maria von Känel, who is a president of the committee leading the "yes" campaign and is herself in a same-sex partnership with two children.

"Everyone should be treated equally," she said. [...]

Despite the changes to the marriage law, Ms. von Känel said there were still a few important points that it did not take into account, such as if both parents would be entitled to parental leave, including in situations where couples undergo reproductive assistance or fertility treatment abroad.

She noted that there was also a lot of work to be done to increase the rights and social acceptance of L.G.B.T.Q. people in Switzerland. This includes creating safe learning environments for L.G.B.T.Q. youth and banning conversion therapy, Ms. von Känel said.

Now there is only one country in Europe that has only civil unions ... and that's Italy. I find this embarrassing, but not surprising, because Catholicism and machismo.

Switzerland has traditionally been a little behind the times, socially, compared to the rest of Europe. The New York Times notes that they "did not grant women the right to vote until 1971 and until 1985 required wives to get permission from their husbands to work outside the home." And of course there was that whole thing with the Nazi bank accounts, which was not great. Far-right extremism has become a pretty serious problem as well.

One article describing Switzerland as not particularly liberal notes that new parents have only 14 weeks of maternity leave. Of course, in the US we have zero weeks of parental leave, so I guess we don't get to judge that.

Still, this is a great day for same-sex couples in Switzerland. Let us celebrate with yodeling

Melanie Oesch - The Queen Of Yodeling

And more yodeling!

Yodelling - Franzl Lang

And also this scene from Heidi!

Shirley Temple In Our Little Wooden Shoes From Heidi 1937

Now go eat some chocolate!

You may now open thread until Stephen and I come back with our wonderful live weekend show!

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Recipe Hub

It's Wonkette's Special Weekend Happy Hour, With The Old Fashioned!

With a bunch of newfangled variations, because you can teach an old dog new tricks.

Greetings, Wonketteers! I'm Hooper, your bartender. It's officially fall, and the weather's getting cold and rainy here in Ohio. Time to cover the oldest cocktail in the book, the Old Fashioned. I'm putting a little twist on the classic, and there are a ton of options when you get the basics down. Here's the recipe.

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Blackface Rosa Parks Lady Explains Herself, Really Does Not Make Anything Better

She really does not seem to think she did anything wrong.

Earlier this week, Lauren Pefferle, a special education assistant at Mabel Rush Elementary in Newberg, Oregon was suspended from her job after coming to school in blackface, in what she claimed was an homage to Rosa Parks, to protest the fact that school required that she and other unvaccinated staff do social distancing and stay at least six feet away from students. It wasn't even a vaccine mandate, as had been previously reported, it was social distancing.

Pefferle came forward on Friday to defend herself, but reportedly still "doesn't understand why her actions are causing offense and accusations of racism." Perhaps she could have asked one of the teachers at the school why that might be. Or one of the students, even.

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