A Children's Treasury Of No Good, Very Bad Austin Bomber Takes
With every mass murder come a mass number of bad takes, and the Austin bomber has been no exception. From family members and police chiefs framing him as a great kid except for the whole killing people thing to alt-right idiots trying to insist that a conservative homeschooled Christian kid was actually a Bernie Sanders-loving member of Antifa, to incels blaming the world for not being nice enough to white guys, we've collected them all in one post for you to cringe at.
I'll take "things you'd only hear about a white male terrorist" for $1200, Alex!
While the "dry wit" comment came from a family member, it was the Wall Street Journal's decision to make that the headline of their story. That was a choice. Can you imagine this being the headline of any story about a person of color who had gone around bombing people? Or committing any crime at all? Because I really cannot.
The aunt interviewed by the WSJ also described him as "the life of the party."
“We had no idea of the darkness that Mark must have been in,” said his aunt, Shanee Courtney, adding, “For him to flip like this is extraordinary. I’m sorry we couldn’t have seen it.”
Ms. Courtney, who lives in Colorado and hosted the Conditt family over Christmas, described her nephew as the life of the party, who had a dry wit and said funny things when the family played cards.
The descriptions given of Conditt sound a lot more like traditional descriptions of victims, rather than perpetrators. He liked tennis! He "stood out for his intelligence"!
Mr. Conditt, who blew himself up after a showdown with police Wednesday morning, stood out for his intelligence, people who knew him said. He had once parried with classmates in a college class through blog posts, voicing his opposition to same-sex marriage, among other issues. He liked tennis, cycling and music, he wrote.
Let me tell you, I read those blog posts -- and a fabulous genius he was not. I'm sure these people felt this way about Conditt, while I'm sure they're shocked and horrified, but maybe this is not the thing we need to be leading with here. Especially since, as many have pointed out, this stands in stark contrast with the way the media portrays black victims of violence.
Exhibit A: a serial bombing terrorist.— Matthew Stender (@StenderWorld) March 21, 2018
Exhibit B: an innocent child.
This is not objectivity. The @nytimes is in the business of humanizing white murderers and demonizing murder victims of color. #WhitePrivilege pic.twitter.com/hKEn81gp6L
Later Wednesday evening, the Austin police chief gave an incredibly confounding statement regarding Conditt's recorded confession.
“Having listened to that recording, he does not at all mention anything about terrorism, nor does he mention anything about hate,” Manley said in a news conference Wednesday. “But instead, it is the outcry of a very challenged young man talking about challenges in his personal life that led him to this point.”
Challenges in his personal life. CHALLENGES IN HIS PERSONAL LIFE. A very "challenged" young man. Challenges that led him to bomb a bunch of people. In a hate-free manner.
What? Did the poor dear have trouble getting a girlfriend? Is that it? Because that really does seem to be main issue these days with these psychopaths who go around murdering a bunch of people. Especially when they are white middle class conservative men.
The Austin Police Chief referred to the serial bomber as a “challenged young man.”— Kumail Nanjiani (@kumailn) March 22, 2018
Murdering multiple people and being called “challenged” is the height of white privilege.
May I also just point out here that no one sees women going around bombing people or shooting up a school or otherwise murder a bunch of people who barely have anything to do with the reason we are mad, because of "challenges" in our personal lives? There was like, that one girl from the "I Don't Like Mondays" song and "Carrie," who was fictional, and that's about it. We don't do this, and we need to start talking about why. Personally, I think it's related to the fact that you also don't see women going around saying "Hey! I was reasonably pleasant and nice to that super hot model guy! WHERE IS MY PENIS REWARD?"
I don't think the only reason why these White Guy Mass Murderers are the only ones who get the "victim of a cruel and unjust society" treatment is because people want to portray them as sympathetic. I think it's also because they're really the only kind of people who would be so surprised by the cruelty and unfairness of the world that they would go and bomb a bunch of people.
A Deplorable Dream Deferred
This is going to sound a little weird, but I am honestly starting to feel a little bad for the Deplorable set. Every time there is a shooter or a bomber or some other kind of violent terrorist, before the identity of said monster is revealed, they get all tingly thinking that this time -- this time -- it's gonna be a BERNIE SANDERS SUPPORTING ANTIFA TERRORIST. They know it in their little shriveled hearts, and as soon as it comes out, the whole country will finally see that wanting everyone to have health care leads to nothing but terrorism. And they will all cheer for Donald Trump and his fan base, and elect them ALL prom queen. Vindication!
It is also worth noting that it looks like someone forgot about Timothy McVeigh. Unless they have retroactively decided he was a Bernie Sanders supporting member of Antifa as well? Could be!
They're so desperate to believe this that even after it was known to pretty much the entire world that Conditt was a politically conservative homeschooled Christian type, they are still very, very sure that he is Antifa.
Well that is just true.
They're even going so far as to obsessively edit his profile on MyLife.com in hopes of someone believing he was a Women's March organizer in Chicago. Earlier, the profile said he was a Scientologist and a DEMOCRAT!
It really is the most pathetic thing. Well, ALMOST the most pathetic thing...
And then there were the incels
As per usual, debate raged on the various incels boards about whether or not he was an one of them. I, for one, am inclined to go with yes, because bombing a bunch of people because of "challenges" in one's personal life kind of screams it.
Over on incels.me, one charming user explained that this was all the fault of modern society for being mean to white men, but also the fault of Texas for letting Austin be its capital.
I suspect so as well, can't wait for the manifesto to leak.
What a dumb faggot though, he had a good thing going and then ruined it by going to the FedEx store with his dumbass disguise and a powered cellphone. Guess he wanted to get caught.
This is what happens tho when you criminalize normal male behavior and turn white men into fucking pariahs. It is a perversion of natural order and I am not at all surprised it happened in Austin. If Texas had any balls, they would move the state capital elsewhere and wall off that cuck cesspool. Austin is the reason I didn't move to Texas; any 'conservative' state that lets a cuck zoo like that be it's capital is a shithole.
Still, not everyone was convinced he was one of them, like this fella over on Looksism.net.
going on shootings has to be the most retarded cope, what’s the point? you go to jail and everyone just hates you and you are an embarrassment to your family.
also this guy isn’t ugly he has ideal colouring and canthal tilt, also a good face shape, but sub human eyebrows
Hot takes all around!
Was Conditt ACTUALLY a deep state MKUltra agent brainwashed to false flag bomb a bunch of people in order to make the alt-right look bad?
It sure would be nice if we could have a murder spree without having to through all of this every time, or even if we could stop having murder sprees every other day in general. Alas, neither of those things seem too likely for the time being.
Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Previously, she was a Senior Staff Writer at Death & Taxes, and Assistant Editor at The Frisky (RIP). Currently, she writes for Wonkette, Friendly Atheist, Quartz and other sites. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse