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Now that it's officially pre-2009, we can start guiltlessly recycling all the material we've already written into Top Ten Posts. Today's took asurprisingly long time to compile. It seemed like a good idea to look at all the funny terms we used to describe our Political Enemies, and it turns out that phrases like "rancid shit-sack," "vulgar fraud," "human garbage," and "cretin" turn up with shocking frequency around these parts. So, after the jump, a painstakingly culled collection of our favorite mean phrases we used to describe objectionable people such as Joe the Plumber, Eliot Spitzer, and of course our all-time favorite, the humanoid sewer-pipe and self-professed eternal virgin Joe Lieberman.


  • George W. Bush: "Bellicose twat of a president"
  • John Edwards: "Vulgar self-regarding horndog"
  • Jonah Goldberg: "Fat Mexican secretary"
  • Joe the Plumber: "A creepy-looking unlicensed handyman in Toledo ... unappealing idiot ... clown of lies ... hydrocephalic ... this goon ... a talentless mook."
  • Joe Lieberman: "It’s like two quarter-pound stools of alien space shit crashed into a toxic waste dumpster in Stamford, Connecticut, fucked, and out came their mutilated, blood-soaked carcass of a baby rat-child, Senator Joseph Lieberman."
  • Kathryn Jean Lopez: "Mouth-breathing fart-sack"
  • Sarah Palin: "Our Snowbilly Dingbat ... a nine-year-old child abandoned at the Wal-Mart in some exurban Alaskan gloom-hole ... a barely functioning idiot."
  • Mark Penn: "Obese incompetent swamp sow"
  • Mitt Romney: "Orange-skinned dog-torturing Scientology-loving Frenchman"
  • Eliot Spitzer: "Secret phone Muppet"
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It started with them damn hats. (Image: Wikimedia Commons)

A guest post by "Knitsy McPurlson," which we suspect is not a real name.

Yr Wonkette is not the only website run by brilliant peoples unafraid to poke people with sharp, pointy sticks. Ravelry.com – a website for knitters, crocheters, and other folks interested in textiles and fiber arts – is poking people with knitting needles, which are very sharp indeed.

This past weekend, Ravelry.com's founders showed the world how easy it is to de-platform white nationalists and racists when they banned all "support of Donald Trump and his administration" from their website, concluding they "cannot provide a space that is inclusive of all and also allow support for open white supremacy." Seems like people smart enough to decode a knitting pattern are also smart enough to decode Trump's not-so-hidden message of racism and white nationalism.

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One day, God willing, my grandchildren will click open their history textbooks and read about the Central American migrant internment camps. They'll learn about sick kids, locked in cages, kept hungry and dirty and cold for weeks on end, and they'll be horrified.

"Bubbie," they'll say, "how could this happen in America? How could there be toddlers sleeping on the ground without blankets, without soap or toothbrushes to clean themselves?"

"I don't know. I wish I had done more. I'm ashamed," I'll say. We will all have to answer for this atrocity. But some of us will have to answer more than others. Not just the archvillains like Stephen Miller and John Kelly, but the people who kept right on doing their jobs, even as those jobs morphed into defending concentration camps.

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