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Thursday morning, Andrew McCabe, the new acting director of the FBI, testified before the Senate Intelligence Committee, and he made some news that will not please sad lying poopstain Donald Trump. :(

Shall we watch some videos together? YES! WE! CAN!

We will start with Republican Senator Marco "Little Marco" Rubio, who wanted to make sure Trump's impetuous crybaby firing of James Comey won't slow down any of the big exciting work of the FBI, which of course includes the Trump-Russia-Pee-Hooker probe:

MCCABE: There has been no effort to impede our investigation to date. Quite simply put, sir, you cannot stop the men and women of the FBI from doing the right thing, protecting the American people, and upholding the Constitution.

Awwww, tough break, Preznit Pussgrab!

Senator Angus King, independent from Maine, wanted McCabe to respond to Sarah Huckabee Sanders's bullshit claim from her Wednesday briefing that the FBI is barely spending any time on the Trump-Russia investigation, because it's totally not a thing. Is that true? Tell us more about the ongoing Russia investigation, Mister FBI Guy!

MCCABE: Sir, we consider it to be a highly significant investigation.

KING: So you would not characterize it as one of the smallest things you're engaged in.

MCCABE: I would not.

VERY, VERY GOOD. WONKETTE LIKEY WHAT WONKETTE IS HEARING.

Later, Senator Ron Wyden of Oregon got McCabe to SAY A PROMISE that, no matter how much Trump stomps his feet and claps his hands, the FBI won't whisper any updates in Trump's ear about the Russia investigation. McCabe also reassured Senator Mark Warner, ranking Democrat on the committee, that if the White House bothers him or tries to pressure him in any way, he will let everyone know. Good boy!

The Trump White House has been going around the past few days claiming that James Comey told Donald Trump, THREE TIMES, that he is not under FBI investigation. Trump reiterated in a Thursday interview with NBC's Lester Holt that he definitely had those three alleged conversations with Comey and that he wasn't making them up. (He is probably making them up.) Senator Susan Collins asked McCabe if an FBI director would even say something like that, and he was like "nah":

Hmmmmm, whom should we believe? Donald Trump or James Comey? WHAT A PICKLE, WE JUST CAN'T DECIDE, just kidding yes we can, because Trump lies.

Finally, here is one more fun moment! Remember how the White House's pack o' lies about the Comey firing has included a consistent line about how Comey had completely lost the trust and confidence of the rank-and-file agents of the FBI? Sarah Huckabee Sanders said it in her press briefing on Wednesday. Well, we have already learned from the myriad leaky stories published over the last 24 hours that that claim is complete bullshit, as the FBI is completely gobsmacked and pissed off over the loss of Comey. To be fair, though, maybe the Trump regime only bothered to ask FBI agents from the New York field office, the ones who know exactly what the freckles on Rudy Giuliani's dick taste like.

Regardless, McCabe very strongly called bullshit on the White House during his testimony:

SENATOR MARTIN HEINRICH: Is it accurate that the rank-and-file no longer supported Director Comey?

MCCABE: No sir, that is not accurate. [...] I can tell you that I hold Director Comey in the absolute highest regard. I have the highest respect for his considerable abilities and his integrity, and it has been the greatest privilege and honor of my professional life to work with him.

I can tell you also that Director Comey enjoyed broad support within the FBI and still does to this day. [...] I can confidently tell you that the vast majority of [FBI] employees enjoyed a deep and positive connection to Director Comey.

Oh.

Well anyway, Acting Director McCabe seems very nice, and we will be sorry to see him go when Trump fires him on Twitter tonight.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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