American Voters Demand Traditional White/Hopeless Stasis

  • A majority of voters in "key battleground states" (continental United States, Hawaii, Alaska, Puerto Rico and Afghanistan) say Barack Obama hasn't changed a single thing in Washington, and if Obama did change something he probably changed it into horrible Socialism. Good gravy, basically everything Obama touches turns into poo/taxes. Is this what America really believes? Yes, according to some poll! This so-called poll also shows that a majority of "battleground voters" think they are voting to impeach Obama/elect Skoalrebel president in November. They are going to be so confused when they see Barack Obama and a whole bunch of crazy Aqua Racist Masturbation Nazi Witch Buddhists hanging out together, in Washington. [The Hill]
  • Lawyers representing the federal government, the state of Alaska and oil barons are not excited about polar bears being placed on the endangered species list. But will these nature-loving lawyers be able to defeat the polar bear hippies in court? [McClatchy]

  • French people are still extremely uncool with raising the "early retirement" age by two years: "Protesters blockaded Marseille's airport, truckers tied up highways and Lady Gaga canceled concerts in Paris ahead of a tense Senate vote Thursday on raising the retirement age." Gaga! Oh la vache! [AP]


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