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In August, we had a Small Internet Kerfuffle when James Damore, a Google employee, sent out a memo to his fellows explaining, in a very constipated way, that chicks are lamers and diversity gives him the sads. Although he was quickly fired for making his colleagues feel totally shitty, his "thoughts," though stupid, were actually pretty mainstream. "Affirmative action means unqualified people are hired" is hardly a controversial topic when half the country elects most of the government to ratify that very thing.

But Google did not agree, and they canned his ass, so he jumped on the Sad Sexist Underground Railroad Train, where his first stop was with this gross MRA alt-right Youtuber cult man, Stefan Molyneux. Thus ensued a whole lot of yowling from people who cried "witch hunt!" and "LEAVE WHITE MEN ALOOOONE" and, we don't know, whatever things come out of Tucker Carlson's fork-tongued mouth. We ignored it. Life's too short.

But just a month later, Damore has proved his former bosses at Google absolutely right. We present: James Damore Can't Understand Why You Are Forcing Him To Be In The KKK?

Last we checked on the writer Jamelle Bouie of Slate, he was still curled in a ball under his desk trying to wrap his brains around James Damore's OBVIOUS TRUTHS: That ... our popular culture hates nerds which is forcing everyone to be cool like the nazees? Like, the world is this

and all the nerds have been stuffed in the locker with atomic flagpole wedgies and there are NO DRAGONS ANYWHERE, AT ALL.

Which leads to

Friendship Macht Frei!

If anything it makes TOO MUCH SENSE.

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Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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The Church of Scientology had some thoughts about Our Robyn's piece, Who Wants To Watch A Creepy White Guy Rap About Scientology? We had some thoughts about their thoughts.

Thanks for writing in, Scientology! As you doubtless realized when you didn't demand we take down our story, but requested it instead, our opinions of your weird cult and that poor young man's rap skills are protected by the First Amendment. (I learned about libel law in college and grad school but also on the job: I was in newspapers so long that I was actually colleagues with Tony Ortega -- about whom you sound quite "venomous" and "biased" -- at the very same newspaper chain you can't believe he defended! Next up, please show your due diligence by talking trash about a woman you didn't know was my mom.)

Also, a lot of your former members say on the record that you kidnap people, and stalk them, and harass them, and sometimes beat them up good, and I request that if so, fucking stop it.

The rest of you click the headline, if you want your OPEN THREAD.

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Monday's Trump-Putin press conference landed on the entire free world like a hot treason-shaped turd, didn't it? Congressional Republicans have been saying mean things about it on Twitter, and even Fox News has been less than 100% supportive! The White House communications department obviously knew it had a crisis on its hands, what with how it's generally considered inappropriate for the leader of the free world to get on all fours in front of the Russian president and wag his tail and slobber with anticipation while he awaits his next marching orders. WOMP WOMP, etc.

So the comms department typed up a thing for the president to read aloud today at the beginning of his meeting with members of Congress, about how he was VERY SORRY he said one word incorrectly during the Putin presser. That's right, only one word of that whole fucking shitshow was wrong. All the rest of his traitor words were exactly what he meant to say.

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