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How much do you hate fake news sites like National Report, which serves only to get the gullible to recirculate poorly written "satire" as truth? All of the hate, right? This week, another of those sites, News Nerd, trotted out a story about Patti Labelle punching Aretha Franklin and now Aretha is suing. Go Aretha.


First, a part of the fake news story, which appears on a website that looks entirely like a real website until you scroll all the way down the page to find a brief "this is for entertainment purposes" disclaimer, except many people do not scroll down for that! Here's the ill-written yet semi-realistic account of the LaBelle assault.

While Aretha Franklin was making her way to the stage, Labelle extended her hand to greet the “Respect” singer, when she threw epic shade in an effort to avoid her. [...]

Franklin was quickly struck [by LaBelle] with a Mayweather style right and left and stumbled backwards, landing awkwardly. Bystanders subdued Labelle and escorted her outside of the venue. Franklin suffered only minor injuries.

Labelle was quickly apprehended by the Atlanta Police Department and charged with assault and battery. She was released on a $10,000 bail and will appear in court on April 16th.

See? That does not really sound fake! It sounds like a 10th-grader wrote it, but it sounds like a real story.

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If there is anything that right-wing men seem to love, it is paying lots and lots of money to other dudes who will tell them how to live and/or function.

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Screenshot- Laura Ingraham Show

According to Rachel Campos Duffy, former reality TV personality and current Fox News personality, migrant baby jails are better than the "Projects". And she totally knows this for fact because she has a "black friend" who told her so. This totally mysterious black friend enlightened her on the horrors faced by black people in black places, which makes it perfectly okay for Trumpco to lock away those "privileged" brown babies. Also, stop being mean to her for spewing that hot garbage on the Laura Ingraham (who believes baby jails are like "Summer Camp") show, because it's not fair that you refuse to believe she has a black friend.

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