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Arizona Fully Recovers From Giffords Shooting, Honoring 'Official State Gun'

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That Arizona shooting? It was pretty awesome. A whole lot of people in Arizona seemed to like it, at least, because guns are cool. The type of gun used in the crime, a Glock, you will remember, suddenly becamea very popular accessory that flew off store shelves. But perhaps here is some more evidence: Arizona is about to name an "official state firearm." While pussier states like yours may have an "official state bird" or "official state rock" or "official state Confederate flag," Arizona is showing how it's done. Say hello to the Colt single-action Army revolver, the official gun of shooting people in Arizona.


Our formerly desert-dwelling pal Cord Jefferson has the embarrassing details on his homeland:

Sponsored by 43 of the 90 members of the Arizona legislature, the new bill seeks to make the Colt single-action Army revolver the "official state firearm" of Arizona. In January, lawmakers in Utah moved to make M1911 semi-automatic pistol the official gun of that state.

In a Facebook group advocating for all states to adopt official state guns, the administrator writes, "States have symbols such as flags, birds, dinosaurs, reptiles, insects, flowers, even cookware. None of these symbols would have become necessary without guns and the freedoms they helped our forefathers obtain."

GUNS MADE BIRDS HAPPEN. GUNS MADE DINOSAURS HAPPEN. WE ARE NOT SURE IF GUNS MADE GOD OR GOD MADE GUNS, BUT THEY'RE PRETTY GOOD FRIENDS, AT LEAST. [GOOD]

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Donald Trump held another great big slob picnic in Orlando, Florida, last night, where he "announced" the "start" of his 2020 campaign, which will be exactly like his 2016 campaign except for the minor detail that he's actually been in the White House since 2017, which is really a bummer, man. Still, it's no reason he can't run as an outsider who vows to protect everyday Americans who believe he's just like them. The rally was a mishmash of the same damn shit he's said a million times before, and the rubes loved almost every minute of it except for the boring parts when he talked about stuff he's supposedly achieved in office, because not even his supporters care about trade policy or tariffs. They want an enemy, and they want to be told they and Trump will destroy that enemy together because they are the real Americans. So that's what Trump gave them, again and again, a feast of fear and resentment designed to get them to the polls. It was enough in 2016, and Trump thinks it'll do the job in 2020.

If there was anything new in the speech -- which was mostly Trump reading from a teleprompter, plus the expected weirdass asides -- nobody has identified it. He complained about the press and the crowd chanted "CNN sucks," and he explained what a threat to the nation Hillary Clinton is -- in fact, he mentioned her eight times during the 80-minute rant.

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