Donate

AZ Teabagger Candidate Running on Traditional Platform of Hypocrisy

News

Arizona GOP congressional candidate Jesse Kelly has passed the official Republican officeholder's personality test by demonstrating that the thing he most loves to talk about hating in public is also the very same thing he most loves to cuddle up with in private: stimulus dollars. (You probably thought for a minute there that we were going to say "penises in the mouth" or perhaps "Mexicans," which would have also been informed guesses.) The family-run construction company owned by Kelly's father and where Kelly also works has vacuumed up $60.8 million in stimulus and other government contracts since 2010, when Kelly lost his first bid for Gabrielle Giffords' seat after running on a platform of opposing the federal stimulus program. This is also part of his current platform now that he is running again. But his campaign has a good defense! And it goes like this: "Well somebody had to take the money." Principles to live by!


Why does the Kelly family construction company love socialism so much, Kelly campaign spokesbot?

"That would have been completely and totally absurd because it had no effect on whether the project would go forward or not," [Kelly campaign spokesman John] Ellinwood said. "These projects were going to be done. Someone was going to get (the contract). ... Somebody will be getting paid."

Can't let those dollar bills falling off the money tree hit the ground and rot!

And because Arizona does not ever half-ass its crazy, the Don Kelly Construction company relies on government-funded contracts for 90 percent of its work. This means the odds are good that Jesse Kelly's salary is paid by the government, which means that like all wingnuts, his one overarching political instinct is to campaign constantly against his own self-interest:

Kelly told voters during his first campaign that his inspiration to run came out of opposition to the 2009 American Recovery and Reinvestment Act.

"I decided to run right after President Obama signed the stimulus that would indebt my 20-month-old son for the rest of his life," Kelly told the conservative magazine National Review in 2010. He said the stimulus and federal earmarks were "bribery with taxpayer money."

"I decided to run right after President Obama signed the stimulus that would indebt my 20-month-old son for the rest of his life help my 20-month-old son pay for college one day." There, fixed.

[Arizona Republic; thanks to Wonkette operative "Sal Q."]

$
Donate with CC

Surprise, everybody! As we suspected, the Trump administration knew about the horrifying family domestic abuse stories in Patrick Shanahan's history, and they were trying to push through his Defense Secretary nomination anyway. We didn't assume they knew because the Trump administration is so very good at vetting people -- it clearly isn't. But, considering the enormity of the story, the question that kept bothering us yesterday when the Shanahan news broke was HOW IN THE HELL DID THEY THINK THIS WOULD STAY SECRET?

CBS News reports:

President Trump said as he departed for Florida Tuesday that he had only learned of Shanahan's family issues for the first time "yesterday."

But that is apparently a lie, or at least we should assume it's a lie, because we should always assume Trump is lying about each and every thing he says, in general. Anyway, whether El Dipshit was personally told, Trump admin people say ayup, they knew all about it:

One senior administration official told CBS News the White House was aware of the incident involving Shanahan's son, but didn't know about the 2010 confrontation. Another official said the White House knew about the 2011 incident dating back to when Bill Shine was White House communications director.

In case you need a quick refresher, the "2010 confrontation" is alleged domestic violence between Shanahan and his ex-wife, whose name is now Kimberley Jordinson, which was detailed in their divorce papers. (The ex-wife was arrested, not Shanahan.) The "2011 incident" is the one where Shanahan's 17-year-old son beat the shit out of his mom -- that same ex-wife -- with a baseball bat and left her in a pool of her own blood, and Daddy appears to have gone to great lengths to cover it up.

As CBS reports, some senators have been very curious as to why they were never informed of this way back in 2017, when Shanahan was nominated to be the deputy secretary of Defense. (He was confirmed.) Did the White House know then? Did Shanahan conceal it from everybody? Is that where the White House vetting process -- which is, again, just awesome, obviously -- went all wrong?

Or does the Trump administration just not think the nominee getting mutually fisticuffy with his wife, and trying to mount a coverup for his son when that son bludgeoned that wife with a baseball bat, is so bad, especially when you are trying to staff your administration with The Best People?

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC

Spinal Tap - Gimme Some Money

Some dick is suing your Wonkette! If you are able, will you please send money?

1. Pick "just once" or "monthly."

2. Pick an amount, like say "all of the money."

3. Click "paypal" if you are paypal or "stripe" if you are not paypal.

4. MONEY.

5. Carry on with your day, and with new posts below!

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

$
Donate with CC
Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Newsletter

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc