Ben Domenech Pretty Sure All White People Are Racist In Text And Email, Right? RIGHT?!?!

White Nonsense
Ben Domenech Pretty Sure All White People Are Racist In Text And Email, Right? RIGHT?!?!

The conservative white man freakouts over the resignation of former Raiders coach Jon Gruden are getting intense, y'all. Charlie Kirk is having a conniption because he's pretty sure the REAL REASON Gruden had to quit is because he's a Catholic white man. We all know how Catholic white men are banned from sports now.

Next up, we have Federalist editor Ben Domenech, who is married to Do You Know Who My Father Was McCain and who is just pretty sure that not only can what happened to Gruden happen to you, it WILL happen to you. And why? Because you are probably also a racist homophobe in your emails too, right? RIGHT? ISN'T EVERYBODY? ISN'T THAT WHAT EMAIL IS FOR? RIGHT? RIGHT? RIGHT?

Jon Gruden's quick forced resignation as coach of the Las Vegas Raiders on Monday is a new level of cancel culture mission creep, and you should care about it, because it's probably going to happen to you.

Probably going to. Probably. As in, whoever you are, if you're reading the Federalist — haha — you're probably one of these days going to wake up to find that your emails have been uncovered in an unrelated investigation, and now you are canceled because you referred to a Black man named DeMaurice as "Dumboriss" and made fun of the size of that guy's lips and also made jokes about "faggots" and "queers."

This is probably going to happen to you, Ben Domenech imagines. We guess this is just how Ben Domenech assumes you probably are. Yep, this is all about you. This is a new and different kind of cancel culture, because Gruden was just talking racisms in his emails, just like you do, right? RIGHT??? He was just makin' jokes about queers! And if you can't make racist and anti-gay jokes in your emails ...

To me, this is the kind of thing you could hear at any sports bar in America on an average NFL Sunday in public.

AND AT BARS! Because everybody makes those jokes at bars on Sundays, says Ben Domenech, right? RIGHT?! Everybody! At all the sports bars!

[W]ho hasn't sent an email or a text that could be considered offensive if shared to the whole wide world?


Who hasn't sent dozens of them over the years?

Why, you're probably sending one right now!

Domenech says it's not that he feels so bad for Jon Gruden personally specifically, because that guy is rich and will probably land on his two feet with some cushy gig somewhere. He's just really really worried it's going to happen to YOU, a nobody, because aren't you a vile racist homophobe in the presence of other white people in email, and aren't you worried you're going to get canceled for it? Well aren't you? AREN'T YOU?

Wait, you aren't?

Then what is Ben Domenech freaking out about? Only Ben Domenech knows what Ben Domenech is freaking out about.

Hey, if you're white, especially if you're a man, you know that thing you've most likely experienced in your life where another white man will say something just astoundingly racist in front of you, even somebody you've never met, and they act all weird and huffy when you call them out for it, like YOU are the one who has violated some kind of code?

That's what this is all about, if we had to hazard a wild fuckin' guess, we reckon.


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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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