Bill Frist Says It Won't Happen If You Do It Standing Up
Gosh, we've sunk billions of dollars into the these government-funded "abstinence education" courses and they're still no more educational than looking at cousin Bubba's Hustler collection behind the Piggly Wiggly. (That's where we learned about douching with Coke!) As you may have heard, a Congressional report of Bush administration-approved (lack of) sex education programs found that these curricula handed down such bits of wisdom as:
• A 43-day-old fetus is a "thinking person."
• HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, can be spread via sweat and tears.
• Condoms fail to prevent HIV transmission as often as 31 percent of the time in heterosexual intercourse.
• Women who have an abortion "are more prone to suicide" and that as many as 10 percent of them become sterile.
Thank God we have elected representatives who know better!
Senator Bill Frist -- who is, we hear, a doctor -- set George Stephanopoulos straight yesterday on "This Week":
Stephanopoulos: You're a doctor. Do you think tears and sweat can transmit HIV"No wonder they let that compassionate conservatism thing slide! You can't even shed a tear for the gays without them giving you their wrath-of-God cooties.
Frist: I don't know...I can tell you..
Stephanopoulos: You don't know?
Frist: I can tell you things like, like..condoms..
Stephanopoulos: ... You believe that tears and sweat might be able to transmit aids?
Actually, he does go on to admit that it would be "very hard" to contract HIV via tears. Guess you can't kill all those cats in the name of science without learning something.
Bill Frist doesn't know if sweat and tears spread HIV! [Crooks and Liars]