- Nancy Pelosi says she's got the votes to pass a Health Care Reform bill in the House, but it will be different than the bill the Senate passed last year, so .... move to Canada? [New York Times]
- Are you a person who looks at the weather news on your cell phone? Congratulations, you are one of the people doing that. [Wall Street Journal]
- The mayor of White Plains, N.Y., is accused of slamming his wife's hand in the car door because she was totally pissing him off. [Lower Hudson Valley]
- More than 700 people died in the 8.8 Chile quake. [BBC News]
- The Winter Olympics ended with a "mime wearing a tool belt" who beat the shit out of Mitt Romney as Celine Dion sang "O! Canada" to Chile. [CNN]