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Bored Condi Calls For Attacking Iran, Because What Else Is There To Do

News

America’s most lovable war criminal, Condoleezza Rice, likes only one thing more than hawking her new book, and that’s warmongering. So now that she’s been removed from the White House (too late), and is back to being a regular old academic-type person, with a new book, what do you suppose she’s doing with all her free time? Why, warmongering, of course! Recently, for example, she called up an Israeli newspaper to demand that everybody attack and kill Iran. What could go wrong? Then she crapped on the Arab Spring for good measure.


In a doom-laden phone interview with the Jerusalem Post, Condi wasted no time calling for throats to be slit. The story’s lead paragraph begins with this utterance:

“The Iranians are seeking a nuclear weapon and are a poster child for terror, supporting it abroad. This is the single most dangerous state in international politics.... It is time for regime change.”

Boom, just like that. No hi, I’m Condi and I play piano – none of that. Just let’s all go over and Fuck Iran, right now.

Predictably, and like her fellow war criminal Donald Rumsfeld, who also has a book (’tis the season), Condi also attempted to claim that the numerous war crimes committed by the Bush Administration were in some way justified. Yawn.

Oh, and what about the Arab Spring, which has toppled dictators and brought hope to millions of oppressed people across the Middle East?

“We should remember that the issue is that freedom and democracy is not the same thing... They have justifiably overthrown authoritarian regimes, but they now have a long process of turning that into democratic institutions.”

In other words, just because a brutal despot has been removed, and a new government installed in its place, that doesn’t mean you can just say “Mission Accomplished” and act like the job’s over. You break it you buy it. [Jerusalem Post]

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