BREAKING, BORING ... Gates Nearly Confirmed As SecDef

Super friends! - WonketteRobert "I'm Not Rumsfeld" Gates has been almost officially put in charge of a big stinking mess. The Senate committee gave the "former" CIA spook and Iran-Contra crook a unanimous vote and now the full Senate will overwhelmingly vote for him. Good luck, bro.

Historians will remember Gates for saying we lost the Iraq War in such a boring way that nobody really noticed. Just imagine what would've happened to, say, John Kerry if he'd stated the obvious back in October 2004. Zell Miller would've personally strangled Kerry and Fox News would've made a billion selling the footage on Pay Per View.

And so America gets its ass handed to it, once again. Dear Secretary Gates: Could we just please stick to easy little wars that we can easily win, like Kosovo or Panama or Belgium or whatever? Thanks, bro.

Senate Armed Services Committee unanimously approves confirmation of Robert Gates [CNN]


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