Breaking: CBS News Staff Uses 'Too Much Hair Product'

America's 49-year-old sweetheart!We weren't exactly heartbroken to learn American Idol winner Katie Couric was taking over the CBS Evening News, because we had no idea the CBS Evening News was still being broadcast.


But it seems to be an important milestone -- for self-obsessed media people, anyway -- so we watched an exciting introduction to Katie's World News right here on the Internets!

"First Look" is a little video thingy for those people who have broadband yet still think news only comes on at 6:30 p.m. It's a sort of behind-the-scenes preview, or something. Honestly, we have no idea what it is, or what purpose it serves other than to make sure we never, ever watch the CBS Evening News.

The new host introduces herself in a croaky voice, admits she doesn't comprehend any of the newsroom lingo, and immediately starts pawing some editor's head while describing the amount of "hair product" the guy uses.

And that's when we turned off the Web video thing and started looking around the office for a knife. You know, for our own throats.

First Look [CBS News]

Katie Couric Makes Anchor Debut at CBS [AP]

Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Newsletter

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc