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Why's everybody gotta pick on poor, sweet Steve Bannon? That is what Breitbart and some of its Jewish pals would like to know. It's important to note from the outset that Breitbart's Jewish pals are in no way anything like the super-majority of American Jews, who are open-minded, loving, liberal-as-fuck people who don't really like palling around with white supremacists like the Breitbart goons do.

[wonkbar]<a href="http://wonkette.com/605625/donald-trumps-new-daddy-turned-dead-breitbart-into-most-delightful-bigoted-shthole-on-internet"></a>[/wonkbar]Ever since President-elect Donald Trump (vomit) announced that Bannon, the Breitbart head who swooped in this summer to run the Trump campaign, would be his chief strategist in the White House, rational people around the universe have been saying WHAT THE FUCK IS GODDAMN WRONG WITH YOU? They are saying this because Bannon is the man who proudly turned Breitbart into a haven for the absolute dregs of American society, the white supremacists and neo-Nazis (also known as just "Nazis") who wish to rend the very fabric of America and reduce it to a pile of rubble. Bannon's already reaching out to racist white nationalists like France's Marine Le Pen, probably for completely innocent purposes, of course.

Oh, and one time, Bannon's ex-wife accused him in divorce papers of not wanting his daughters going to school with a bunch of Jewish people, because he really doesn't fucking like Jews.

And that seems to be the sticking point for the Breitbart boys! They're not that wee-weed up about people calling Bannon a white supremacist, because pfffffft, obviously. They're just mad people are seizing on Bannon's alleged anti-Semitic record, because it's a well known fact that ALL DUMB LADIES lie in divorce papers about how their husbands hate Jewish people.

Let's eavesdrop on some Jewish guys yammering over at Breitbart about how it's simply unkind of everybody to accuse Joseph Goebbels Steve Bannon of anti-Semitism:

Nationally syndicated radio talk show host Dennis Prager called accusations of antisemitism against Stephen K. Bannon “libel” on Wednesday.

Dennis Prager is a fucking terrible person who likes it when kids go hungry and thinks sexual assault is hilarious. Just FYI.

“It’s the worst witch-hunt in American history, what’s going on now, and it’s going to continue,” [Breitbart writer David] Horowitz said.

“To take a pro-Jewish defender of Israel like Steve Bannon, and — with no evidence — call him an antisemite is hard even to comprehend.”

Horowitz said there were only two pieces of evidence used against Bannon — one a court filing by a “disgruntled ex-wife,” and the other “a headline that I wrote — I sent an article to Breitbart unsolicited … and they just printed what I sent … and the headline was, ‘Bill Kristol, Republican Spoiler, Renegade Jew’.”

DAVID HOROWITZ WROTE THAT ANTI-SEMITIC BULLSHIT, NOT STEVE BANNON. Noted! In fact, we noted it right here! Horowitz's argument was that Jewish Bill Kristol was in bed with "Jew-hating Hitlerites" who supported Hillary Clinton and that Iran nuclear deal to keep Iran from getting nukes, which, in braindead wingnut land, was actually a deal to send Iran brand new nuclear weapons in the mail once a month, like Dollar Shave Club.

David Horowitz has more thoughts:

In contrast, he said: “What did Steve Bannon, who is Trump’s chief strategist, do? They reached out Trump to call [Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin] Netanyahu and call Israel a ‘beacon of hope.’”

“This is the best president the Jews could wish for!” Horowitz concluded.

Bannon called Bibi Netanyahu on the Obamaphone! Surely that means he loves all Jews, even the millions of American Jews who think Netanyahu is KINDA scary. One thing we will grant here is that we are more than willing to believe Steve Bannon hates Muslims far more than he hates Jews, even if he hates Jews too, which he probably does, because he headed up what's basically an Aryan Nation website, not that we should jump to conclusions, except for how fuck it, we're gonna keep jumping to conclusions. If the Anti-Defamation League is like "Anti-Semitic dick turd say what?" we're gonna assume they know what they're talking about.

The Breitbart Jewish guys' final point is I KNOW YOU ARE BUT WHAT AM I, because Democratic Rep. Keith Ellison is a Muslim who used to defend Louis Farrakhan when he was a student, but who later said he was a dumb kid back then and is very sorry he used to defend an anti-Semitic guy like that. Therefore, Q.E.D. Bitchez! and stop being mean to Donald Trump's white supremacist Breitbart daddy Stephen Bannon, who loves The Good Kind Of Jews (the ones who read Breitbart) whole lots of bunches, END OF STORY.

[Pravda]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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