Brief update on Alberto Gonzales' appearance before the Senate Judiciary Committee
Attorney General Gonzales considers FISA to be a living document, because we cannot possibly know the original intent of its drafters.
According to the AG, calling wiretapping of American citizens in America "domestic surveillance" is "like flying from Texas to Poland and calling it a domestic flight." That convinces us! There's no need for the NSA or any other concerned party to seek permission from a "judge" before shooting said plane down.
Democratic Senators: If you'd just asked us for blanket permission to wiretap American citizens without a warrant or probable cause, we totally would've let you. Why'd you have to go and make this so difficult? We have to get all outraged and stuff now!
Specter: If you'll excuse me for one moment, I have to go screw over people with Mesothelioma. To ensure that not even the most interested parties can possibly follow the rest of this hearing, I'm leaving Brownback in charge.
AG: While it's true that Hamdi doesn't apply to mechanical surveillance, I would like to inform the committee that Prince totally shredded on SNL last Saturday.
Whoops... think we accidentally changed the channel.
UPDATE: We changed it back and Leahy's pissed! Angry, sputtering old man Leahy wants Gonzales off his lawn, dammit!
LEAHY: This sounds like C.Y.A., Mr. Attorney General.
SENATORS HATCH (R-Utah) and FEINSTEIN (D-Cal): Blah blah blah...
Back to Prince.