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But What Do Wingnuts Think About Michael Steele's Personal Love of Abortion?

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That Michael Steele, he reallyis modernizing the Republican Party! You ladies want an abortion? That's "hip hop" with him! Gays? Hey, not their fault! Rush Limbaugh? Well he's an ugly clown, but of course Mike is sorry for saying the truth, whoops! Websites? Let's make them functional! In other words Michael Steele is another Maryland liberal, just as wishy-washy as any Eastern Seaboard cocktail-party Democrat. Some Republicans seem to be very unhappy about him, on the Internet. They're even throwing out Woody Allen references!


  • "In 1983, Woody Allen made the mockumentary film Zelig about a man who longs for approval so badly that he changes to fit the people who are surrounding him. The movie may as well have been written about Michael Steele, who continues to tie himself in knots as part of his effort to reach out to moderates." [American Spectator]
  • "For obvious racial reasons, parallels between President Barack Obama and Steele have been drawn many a time. A more honest depiction, perhaps, would be to that of his loquacious side kick, the wordiest man in Washington -- Vice President Joe Biden." [Red State]
  • "I'm done. Michael Steele cannot lead the Republican Party. I don't want a leader who attacks conservative leaders. I don't want a leader who smiles and agrees when Republicans are called Nazis. I don't want a leader who waffles on abortion every time he's asked about it. That's not good enough. If this party wants the support of pro-lifers then Michael Steele must go." [Free Republic]
  • "He also may have voted for Jimmy Carter." [K-Lo]
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Blanket Disclaimer: Spitting on anybody is dead wrong. Even if it's a Trump.

Still, Eric Trump got to eat a tiny slice of the shit pie women, minorities, poors, disabled, and all of the other people who are deemed "takers" or who come from "shithole countries" experience at some point in their lives: He got spit on. By a woman, according to Breitbart (no link), because we are evil. Woe unto the wealthy white man! Wealthy white men are some of the most abused and marginalized people in the Universe, according to wealthy white men, and Eric Trump is no exception. Please cry for wealthy white men, ok you can stop now. Another group of Americans that are constantly abused, marginalized, and even denied their rights by the very same type of wealthy men that spawn such men as Eric Trump, are called "women." And apparently we are mean as fuck now.

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Well folks, we think we have a geopolitical relations first for an American president. We might need to consult with Doris Kearns Goodwin or Kevin Kruse, but we cannot recall a time one of America's purported enemies OR friends has called the president of the United States "retarded" or anything along those lines. We remember leaders hating American presidents. We remember them recoiling like UGH GET OFF ME when an American president tried to give them a friendly sensual love massage during the G8. We remember them literally attacking our democratic elections in order to prevent the inaugurations of potential presidents they despise and fear. But we don't remember anything like this.

President Hassan Rouhani of Iran, commenting on Donald Trump after the Trump administration threw some new sanctions at Iran on Monday:

Iran warned Tuesday that new U.S. sanctions targeting its supreme leader and other top officials meant "closing the doors of diplomacy" between Tehran and Washington amid heightened tensions, even as President Hassan Rouhani derided the White House as being "afflicted by mental retardation."

Here is the full quote, in case you were wondering if something was lost in translation, like that time Vladimir Putin called Trump "brilliant" and Trump was so excited he left a ring of orange jizz around the bathtub, but what Putin actually said in Russian more accurately translates as "colorful" or "shiny." There's no confusion here:

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