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Wonkers, someone has a sad, and it is Rick Perry. Why is he sad? Cause HE AIN'T GOT NO ICE CREAM.

(We believe the credit for the above should go to @eastsidekate.)

Can you help Rick Perry, Wonkers? Hahaha, just kidding, of course you cannot. Rick Perry is beyond help, and also a picture of him has finally been snapped in which we do not want to Do It on him.

Send your creations to tips at wonkette dot com, along with some sort of subject heading that lets us know we will find inside your email a Blingeed or MS-painted picture of Rick Perry. Send them in by Monday, and Dok will choose a lucky winner for a tote bag or some shit. (The cups cost like 12 bucks to mail, fuck that.)

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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