Cancel Your Plans To Honeymoon In Dagestan

  • Rhode Island, "the Ocean State," was ironically unprepared for massive flooding that hit this week. [CNN]
  • Kathleen Sebelius sent a sternly worded memo to insurers telling them that they had to be nice to children, even the ones with wonky aortas. [ABC News]
  • The long-awaited spike in swine flu cases has finally come to Georgia, where residents routinely enjoy intercourse with pigs. [Times-Herald]
  • Bad week for Russia. They got suicide-bombed again. [New York Times]
  • Holy crap President Obama actually listened to all those "drill baby drill" people, and now he's going to open up "huge offshore areas" to drilling for oil and natural gas. [BBC News]
  • The Serbian Parliament finally said "Sorry, our bad" regarding the worst massacre in Europe since World War II. [CNN]

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