Get out your Post-Tragedy Bingo Cards, kids -- the Family Research Council (motto: "All research vetted by our opinion") has found a couple of additional suspects inlast weekend's killing spree in Isla Vista, California. While crazy feminists think that maybe the killings might have something to do with Elliot Rodger's open declaration of hatred for women who didn't give him the sex he so richly deserved, the FRC wants nothing to do with such facile explanations, which make no sense at all since women actually do owe men sex, at least if the men do dishes. Instead, they link Rodger's murderous impulses to far more logical culprits: marriage equality and the Affordable Care Act. It's such a relief to see that we're finally reaching a sensible interpretation of this otherwise inexplicable event.

On Tuesday, we got two seemingly contradictory but ultimately consistent explanations of Isla Vista from the FRC. First, Ken Blackwell, a senior fellow with the organization, kicked around with FRC president Tony Perkins the "root cause" of violence in America, which is, of course, “the crumbling of the moral foundation of the country” and “the attack on natural marriage and the family.” You see, all this shooting and stabbing is just a natural result of people getting married when they have the wrong configuration of genitalia, which pretty much opens the gates to all sorts of horrors. Blackwell continued,

“When these fundamental institutions are attacked and destroyed and weakened and abandoned, you get what we are now seeing[.]”

Heck, the big surprise is that with all the gay marrying going on, there's not a lot more massacres. This is just simple logic, sheeple.

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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