Chicago, Take Away The Greatest Part Of Me! (TONIGHT!)
HA ha ha, Chicago, MADISON got naked Daryl Hannah, and you get this DUMB SONG! Chicago, we will see you tonight at wineHouse, 3164 N. Broadway, 7:30-9:30 p.m.! We are bringing in catering from Brazilian Bowl (on us) and you are buying your own wine tasting ticket for $25 (on you). If you are le broke, please email me at rebecca at wonkette dot com and say I WANT TO COME! The Wonkette Nation sent lots of money for you to join us, don't be shy!
Here, have some shitty blurry pictures from our incredible Madison house party last night!
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, Sun., March 18, 2-5 p.m. Callyson says we should go to Pennsylvania Brewing Company, 800 Vinial Street, Pittsburgh. We'll be in the restaurant I guess, I don't know, they're not open till 11 a.m. for me to call them.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, Tues., March 20. Unknown at press time!
Brooklyn, NY. Join us at your comrade Erin’s restaurant Grindhaus in the Red Hook neighborhood! Again, appetizers on me, drinks out of your own wallet. Thurs., March 22, I think maybe 7 p.m.
Washington DC! We’re buying you pizza somewhere Fri., March 23, to carbo load for the Teens March for Our Lives, then meeting you somewhere else Saturday morning!
Baltimore, Maryland! Holy Frijole, Sun., March 25, 4-7 p.m.
Morgantown, West Virginia! Let us wipe off the coal dust and kiss you on your FED UP faces! Mon., March 26. And then …
Looks like Kansas City!
And then Denver!
Possibly Wyoming? If you live in Wyoming, email me, like "I live in Wyoming." And then to home!
Thank you for loving Wonkette. We love you right back, which is why we are throwing you FIFTEEN PARTIES on our road trip to DC that will never end.
Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.