Clean Up in Aisle Five: Rove Goes Grocery Shopping

A Wonkette operative reports spotting Karl Rove at the Tenleytown Whole Foods. Yeah, yeah, we thought that, too: Doesn't he just get fed through a tube like Cheney? Perhaps he was buying some free-range eggs to throw at protesters or something. Anyhow, our operative elaborates:


Never figured to see the "evil genius" in that bastion of liberal elitism but there he was the beady eyed, mellon headed little fuck with his wife. We made brief eye contact while checking out the goat cheese, I saw fleeting panic on his humpty dumpty visage as he realized I recognized him and I think he was afraid I was going to out him and he would end up being granola'd to death before he could make his escape. I always figured Rove as more of a Sutton Place kind of guy....

Operative report continues after the jump.

generously giving up his shopping cart to dissipated old world diplomat types with a proclivity for playing the rump ranger with the riding crop and the monocle, (unt - ja!) who, once the cart is loaded down with bon bons and beef steaks realize the right front wheel has a flat spot rendering it useless and start kicking the cart and whining at the black staff in a  thick euro accent - schiss, de kart is kapute dumkopf ver dampt - and you know the sister at the register is having non of that - yo Helmut you either wheel that shit over here or you go hungry cause I sure as shit aint bustin my black ass. Meanwhile Rove and Bush giggle and elbow each other in the corner while shooting spitballs at Mustafa behind the meat counter - who is methodically honing his meat cleaver - ouch - while muttering bloody infidels.
Need we add that this email came from a dot-gov address? Your tax dollars at work... but not for long, because you know Karl is going to track this fucker down. Sorry, guy! Enjoy your government cheese.
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