Co Co. Sala: Creepy Men And Glorious Dessert


Co Co. Sala is supposed to be the perfect place for a first date or a ladies’ night out. There are chocolate desserts, a bar stocked with girly cocktail drinks and sexytime mood lighting. So why is this place so lame?

The reality of the situation is this: there is something desperately uncool about Co Co. Sala. And it’s not just the sleek furniture and the house music. (What is this, Barcelona circa 1999? When will people realize the “modern lounge” look is over?) It’s the people. Everybody looks like they are there to get laid. The room is filled with sleazy, over-moisturized men and Hill women (shudder) with their tits shoved up to their chins, eating bonbons suggestively and getting “drunk” off Riesling. It’s enough to make you lose your appetite.

Well, almost. The food, although expensive, is worth the money -- Co Co. Sala certainly does magical things to chocolate. The playful Childhood Favorites “3-course dessert experience,” included a warm Boston cream pie doughnut rolled in granulated sugar, a peanut butter ice cream cake dripping with chocolate syrup and a strawberry cheesecake lollipop dusted with Pop Rocks. The “experience” did have a few misses -- the mint chocolate chip cone tasted of shaving cream and the cappuccino panna cotta had the texture of a rubber stamp.

If sweets aren't your thing, Co Co. Sala’s small plates menu has everything that a small plates menu should have: mini burgers, tuna tartar, crab cakes and mac n’ cheese, all quite good.

It's just too bad that Co Co. Sala's vibe is such a turn off, because the food is really fantastic. But if you can withstand getting hit on by butterfaces and foreign men in suede jackets, by all means, go.

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We know, the thing we said in our headline is a thing you can say every day, but it's really intense today, maybe because Donald Trump is now filled with fear of the inescapable reality that millions of Americans who have not read the Mueller Report are going to see Robert Mueller testify on live TV on July 17, and Donald Trump will be exposed. Maybe the Big Mac vending machine next to his golden toilet is on the fritz and he hasn't had gotten to eat a Big Mac on the poop chair since last night. Maybe he's just a weak and sad person, a collection of shithole cells God meant to throw in the garbage, but accidentally implanted in Mary Trump's turkey incubator. We imagine that'd lead to a pretty constant state of anxiety and ennui.

Whatever it is, he's totally fucked right now. We were going to write a nice post about Trump's batshit interview on Fox Business with Maria Bartiromo, but we were busy, and by the time we got to it, he had performed so many batshit feats that we're just going to stick them all in this one post.

Let's start with the fight he's trying to wage with US soccer star Megan Rapinoe, who in a now-viral video stated that she has no fuckin' interest in going to the White House to meet that idiot. He got into a quarrel with her on Twitter ... or at least with a Twitter account that didn't belong to her. It's now been replaced, in order that the adult president may shit-tweet at the soccer superstar who hurt his feelings, but Splinter grabbed the original:

The rant continued:

Right. And Megan Rapinoe just said win or lose, she has no interest in meeting your crusty ass, because no decent American would consider that an honor.

Besides, she has already been to the White House to meet a legitimately elected president:

By the by, the owner of the incorrect Megan Rapinoe account saw Trump's whining and told him to grow a dick and set it on fire:

Ya burnt!

But as we said, it was a whole day of batshit from Trump, so let's continue.

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DING DONG THE WITCH IS ... quite likely to land on her feet. But for today, the New York Times reports Dana Loesch is out of a job, the latest casualty in the war between the NRA and its longtime advertising company Ackerman McQueen. But every cloud has a silver bullet lining, since Dana will have more free time now to spend on her favorite hobby. We can't wait to see which cartoon character she photoshops Klan hoods onto next. Maybe she'll branch out and start putting Nazi armbands onto Buzz Lightyear. Oh, we would be so triggered!

As one of the most visible characters on NRATV with literal hundreds of viewers for each of her fascist rants, Dana Loesch was a tireless advocate for the gunhumpers lobby, always ready to call out "tragedy dry-humping whores," threatening to "fist" or perhaps "fisk" the New York Times, and expressing her hope that the Mueller Report would die in an "AIDS fire."

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