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Come To Wonkette's Patriotic Inaugural Ball This Friday!

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To honor Barack Obama's swearing-in as the first Luo president of America, ever, your Wonkette is hosting a sexy sexy party this Friday -- yes, the one that's in two days! Ha ha! And it's free for everyone, with the musics and the alcohols. America's videographer Liz Glover will play host at her very own yoga studio to boot! Oh boy! Details!


  • Where/when?

    10PM till seriously whenever

    @ BIKRAM YOGA CAPITOL HILL

    410 H Street N.E. Washington, DC 20002

    BYOB IF YOU WANT TO

    $5 suggested donation (or you can pay nothing and be BANNED FOREVER from LIFE)

  • Who will play the musics and show you the sexy moving pictures? Descriptions from DC's own resident art cartographer Nikolas Schiller, who knows all the hot tickets in this town!

    BIG GOLD BELT

    "visionary seductive sleaze from Luke & Christina, live music/video performance"

    DJ ANDREW MORGAN

    "People's Potential honcho spinning records so mind-bogglingly nasty that they don't even actually exist"

    BEAUTIFUL SWIMMERS

    "Future Times heroes (DJ Ari G and Disco City's Maxmillion Dunbar) banging that slow, aquatic house vibe"

    Mmhmm!

  • Why?

    FOR AMERICA! (Free beer.)

  • Should I RSVP?

    Hmm maybe! Not really, ha. BUT if you're interested, please send an e-mail indicating you would like to come to tips@wonkette.com, subject line, "I HAVE COORDINATED MY BUMPASS-ROSE TO WONKETTE'S PARTY," just so we can get a basic headcount, ok? Deal with it?

    There will be a Facebook info page soon, for the kids. UPDATE: Facebook event page is here! You can respond there too! Post wacky pictures!

    Peggy Noonan and Bill Kristol will be there too, with that same aquatic vibe, because they are fish. Uhh that's all for now. Come!

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Corey Stewart, the Minnesota transplant to Virginia who's made protecting "Confederate Heritage" a top issue in his campaign for the US Senate, accused a nosy New York Times reporter of breaking into the apartment of one of his aides. It's a terrific accusation, because while there's no evidence at all and the story makes no damn sense, that doesn't matter at all to people who'd vote for Corey Stewart. They already hate the evil media and know those nasty reporters are capable of all the depravity in the world.

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Hey, remember that hilarious time when Paul Ryan and Kevin McCarthy got caught on tape joking that LOL, Donald Trump and Congressman Dana Rohrabacher were totally on Putin's payroll? WaPo got the goods:

"There's two people I think Putin pays: Rohrabacher and Trump," McCarthy (R-Calif.) said, according to a recording of the June 15, 2016 exchange, which was listened to and verified by The Washington Post.

Rep. Dana Rohrabacher is a Californian Republican known in Congress as a fervent defender of Putin and Russia.House Speaker Paul D. Ryan (R-Wis.) immediately interjected, stopping the conversation from further exploring McCarthy's assertion, and swore the Republicans present to secrecy.

It's funny 'cause it's true! ALLEGEDLY. Earlier this month, Congressman Lubyanka Rohrabacher told Fox reporter Elex Michaelson that DNC hack was obviously an inside job.

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