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Congress Bravely Pushes Cafeteria Cheese-Slop on Our Children

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America's children are still by and large grotesquely overweight these days, we hear? AND STAY THAT WAY is the message from the corporate shills in Congresswaging a heroic battle against a USDA proposal requiring school cafeterias to quit counting french fries and tomato sauce on frozen pizzas as "vegetables," because the "federal government shouldn't be telling children what to eat." Except that, by putting a giant pile of oil-and-salt-packed sawdust shavings on the plate of every child in America's school lunch lines, they kind of are!


The Associated Press reports:

A spending bill released late Monday would unravel school lunch standards proposed by the Agriculture Department earlier this year, forcing USDA to pull back an attempt to limit potatoes on the lunch line, delaying limits on sodium and delaying a requirement to boost whole grains.

The spending bill also would allow tomato paste on pizzas to be counted as a vegetable, as it is now. The department's proposed guidelines would have attempted to prevent that.

Of course, brave as they are, the obesity-pushers in Congress never do anything without orders from their corporate overlords. So now you are probably wondering, who are the real heroes here, calling for early death by complications from diabetes for America's bulging youths? Don’t think too hard! “The changes had been requested by food companies that produce frozen pizzas, the salt industry and potato growers,” the report adds. So long as there Congresspeople in Congress, these Key American Industries will always have a voice.

Maybe it really is time for a few drones over Burger King? [AP]

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It was bound to happen. We're now watching Republican congressmen react to Donald Trump sitting in the Oval Office and saying "RUSSIA IF YOU'RE LISTENING" during an interview with George Stephanopoulos, literally inviting hostile foreign powers to attack the 2020 election for him like Russia did in 2016. And if you thought there wouldn't be at least one of them to say the quiet part loud and state for the record that crime is good if it helps Republicans win, then you haven't been paying attention to the Republican party in quite a while.

Enter GOP Rep. Chris Stewart of Utah, who sits on the House Intelligence Committee, AKA the committee whose members really should know better, even the Republicans, but unfortunately they don't because A) they're idiots and B) they've been sucking at Devin Nunes's dairy cows' teats (ALLEGEDLY) for too long:

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