Conservative Website Wants Dumb Actor To Embarrass Bill Kristol


Bill Kristol, the tragically dumb wingnut who wouldn't be published beyond the Free Republic comments section if not for his famous conservative father who could actually write,was publicly fired from the New York Times this morning -- ending a yearlong national comedy in which, each Monday, he would offer some banal nonsense that, if it wasn't completely and indisputably wrong before he even typed it, would be proven to be utterly false within a few hours of publication. There's only one way to improve a day like this, and the parody blog "Big Hollywood" has the solution: Offer $100,000 to the movie actor Matt Damon in exchange for, uh, calling Kristol a dipshit in public somewhere.

Beating up on Kristol has become the national pastime of America's literate, and it would all be hilarious if his never-ending stream of bullshit was about something inconsequential, like pro football or stamp collecting. Instead, this goon focuses his halfwit attentions on matters of war and death and horror, which he always supports, unquestionably and unthinkingly, as long as it helps destroy America.

Kristol's shameful idiocy is built upon a mountain of bones. To the 4,553 American and Coalition troops slaughtered and blown up in Iraq, to the 90,000+ confirmed Iraqi civilians murdered in this nightmare battle over nothing, Kristol offers ... a new pamphlet of vicious lies, explaining how it was worth it after all!

So, really, until he's rotting in the bowels of Abu Ghraib (which is opening again, hooray!), Bill Kristol should be mercilessly harassed by everyone, especially children. Think of Kristol as a more approachable George W. Bush. Let him know what you think, America!

And in this country, the United States of America, even movie actors are considered Americans -- no matter how embarrassed they make us feel, for them. So if teen heart-throb Matt Damon wants to call Kristol an idiot, we will consult the tiny Constitution in our pocket (a gift from Dennis Kucinich) and encourage Matt Damon to go ahead and call Kristol an idiot. Make a movie about it, even! Didn't Matt Damon have a funny movie one time, where he and his "buddy" had some weekend adventure, but the "buddy" was actually a corpse or something, in a boat? Let's laugh again, America!

Anyway, this comedy website, "Big Hollywood," says it will give Matt Damon a hundred grand ($100,000) if he "debates" Bill Kristol, this retard, somewhere in public. They are proud about this idea!

And this is how the tragic, doomed American Right dies, with pointless offers of $100,000 to an actor, if the actor will repeat some conventional-wisdom opinion which was already stated, for public consumption, in a major daily newspaper. WTF?

Iraq War Showdown: Bill Kristol Agrees to Debate Matt Damon After Actor’s “Idiot” Slam [Big Hollywood]


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