HOLY GRIFT! Send This Fox Creep Money For ... Literally No Reason At All


Don't let it be said that conservatives are unfeeling and incapable of compassion. They might collectively shrug when an immigrant child dies but their tear ducts activate at full blast whenever someone like them is mildly inconvenienced. Pardes Seleh, described as a "prominent conservative commentator" by very kind people, has become the poster girl for liberal cruelty in a time when decent people just want to kick back and relax while Donald Trump makes America great again.

Seleh tweeted Thursday morning that for the "second time" this week, she'd been "rejected from an apartment/house in DC" because she worked at Fox. She's also written for RedAlert Politics and The Daily Wire. We should clarify that Seleh wasn't turned down by a landlord but by individuals looking for a roommate. She attached to the tweet the very polite email rejection she'd received.

"Thank you for your interest Pardes. After perusing your various journalistic and social media posts, it's pretty clear your politics views are diametrically opposed to ours (and we hate Fox). Hopefully you will find a place where that will be a good fit."

I conducted a thorough, five-minute review of Seleh's Twitter feed and objectively determined that she is annoying. I can't imagine why anyone would want to share a common space and a bath with her. It's possible her prospective roommates were just letting her down easy. Her odious politics were fairly evident so latch onto that and let her feel like a martyr. After all, this was literally the tweet right before she whined about being denied housing like she was a black person trying to use Airbnb.

Surprisingly, a self-described "very liberal" gay couple didn't want to live with someone who believed their political views made them more inclined for theft and violence. This seems reasonable to me, but then I'm just part of the "virulent anti-white, anti-Christian, anti-conservative hatred" that's flooding the nation since Trump's election. That's at least the running theory at BizPac Review, which ran a piece Thursday that I like to call "The Ballad of Pardes Seleh."

Though the roots of this hatred remain unknown, a growing number of Americans believe the media bear at least some responsibility for stirring the pot and ginning up even more animosity.

Really? You think there's a surge of liberal and minority "hatred" after Trump's election yet the "roots" of this sentiment remain a mystery to you? Have you met the current president?

The BizPac article claims that Seleh doesn't wish to be a "victim" while sharing video of her stating how she's been victimized. I'm not including the video here because it's torture to watch and I care too much about all of you.

"I respect people who are very passionate about their views, but I've never been a very passionate person when it came to politics. …. But I'm still being treated as a Nazi."

"Not by everybody. I've got some nice liberal friends. … But in general, because I live in D.C., which is a very blue district, I really feel oftentimes like I'm treated like a Nazi."

I don't think Nazis historically had housing problems. The arc of Nazism was primarily Indiana Jones villain and then war criminal hiding in Argentina. Why do conservatives fixate on the part where people who committed genocide were no longer invited to the best New Year's Eve parties? Why are they identifying with Nazis in the first place? Seleh's video includes a possible pitch for a CW series featuring herself before she starts up again about Nazis.

"I'm not a person with a political agenda. I'm really just a 25-year-old trying to make it in D.C., trying to do good at what I do, maybe have some fun, make friends," Seleh's video message continued.

"I'm not a person with a big agenda, but because of my political views or the places I've worked at … I'm just always being treated like a right-wing Nazi."

Bigotry has traditionally been a pastime with few negative repercussions. You treated people of color, gays, and religious minorities like garbage and it never proved a problem. Times have changed, though, and the "tolerant left" has developed an intolerance to the bigotry lifestyle. Now, you can't even be an open white supremacist who dresses funny without people boycotting your show's advertisers. It's not just asshole TV hosts who are affected. Where will it end?

The American Conservative's Rod Dreher, a grownass man, carried the cross for Seleh in a post Thursday called "Pardes Seleh, Ideological Hobo." He argued that it's time for all the "Bake the Cake, Bigot" people to "stand up" for Seleh. He does recognize that as a conservative he's done nothing but advocate for the right of private citizens to discriminate against people based on their sincerely held beliefs. However, he just wanted to point out "a certain sort of hypocrisy." Fair enough. I'd just like to point out that Dreher doesn't understand what "hypocrisy" means. People not wanting to do business with gay people is different from gay people not wanting to socialize with people who actively support their discrimination.

It's funny that conservatives want to spin Seleh as the "open-minded" person willing to live with gay liberals. What is she actually sacrificing in her pursuit of a 20something "Will & Grace" fantasy lifestyle? If perceived hipness is a commodity, perhaps gay people have every right not to share it with anyone who willingly enables Trumpism.

Don't worry too much about Seleh, though. A GoFundMe was set up for her yesterday and in just 18 hours, it raised its entire grift goal of $1,500. WAIT! She's now increased it to $2000! Holy grift! She actually doesn't need money by all accounts, just people willing to live with her. And I don't think you can set a price on the required self-sacrifice.

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Seattle. However, he's more reliable for food and drink recommendations in Portland, where he spends a lot of time for theatre work. His co-adaptation of "Jitterbug Perfume" by Tom Robbins runs from March through May at Pioneer Square's Cafe Nordo.

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CLEAR YOUR CALENDARS FOR FEBRUARY 7! And then fill them back up with whatever the fuck you want, because Michael Cohen has announced through his lawyers that he is too scared to testify before an open session of Congress that day, citing threats to his family from Donald Trump and Rudy Giuliani.

Wonkette has no reason to believe Cohen isn't being serious here, and NBC News reports Cohen's wife and father-in-law are particularly concerned about their safety if the man who used to call his boss MIS-TURRRR TWUMP goes to Congress and tells the truth this time. Still, we must pause to note that this is the same guy who said this to NPR reporter Tim Mak, back when Mak was at The Daily Beast:

"I will make sure that you and I meet one day while we're in the courthouse. And I will take you for every penny you still don't have," Cohen told Mak [...] "And I will come after your Daily Beast and everybody else that you possibly know."

"So I'm warning you, tread very fucking lightly, because what I'm going to do to you is going to be fucking disgusting. You understand me?"

It's not so fun when the shoe is on the other foot, IS IT, MICHAEL?

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Did Nancy Pelosi do something to give Donald Trump the mistaken impression he has leverage here? We don't remember her doing anything like that!

Trump sent Pelosi a letter this morning to say that, despite how she told him to stay the fuck out of her House because of his government shutdown, he would still be coming to the House on January 29 to deliver his State of the Union address. And for some weird-ass reason, Trump and his advisers in the White House actually thought she would back down. It's both hilarious and alarming that Trump and his people are that stupid, isn't it?

Anyway, Pelosi took the dare. She took the dare. Was there anybody besides those dumb fucking idiots in the White House who thought she wouldn't take the dare?

Pelosi sent a letter right back to Trump to kindly explain to him that no means "go fuck yourself," and that if he'd like her to stick her foot further up his ass and kick it around a bunch, he's welcome to test her some more:

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