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David Vitter's Primary Opponent Puts the 'Tender' in 'Contender'

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Things are heating up in the GOP primary race between diaper-lovin' David Vitter and his opponent Chet Traylor, who sure seems to enjoy sipping on that fruity drive-thru daiquiri called "romance," hoo wee. Democratic state Rep. Noble Ellington says Traylor, a Louisiana Supreme Court justice,stole his wife right out of his lovin' arms and married her. And then when the wife died, Traylor started making out with Ellington's daughter-in-law while she was still married to Traylor's stepson. Family values, indeed! This race will go down in the history books as "Home-wrecking Judge Battles the Poop Monster."


Traylor’s campaign manager Lev Dawson -- who is an official Sweet Potato Kingpin -- calls Traylor's reputation "impeccable," but maybe he really meant "impeccadillo-ful"? Because in addition to all the sexing, Traylor's also facing a lawsuit filed by his dead wife's two sons, Fox News reports:

Ellington's two sons filed suit last month to try to compel Traylor to hand over parts of the estate and provide information to them about it, something Ellington says Traylor has resisted.

Maybe Traylor's not ignoring them but simply too busy making love on an oily beach to pick up the phone and take their calls. From the sounds of it, he moved fast on snatching up his new lady-love, beginning their relationship "just a few months" after his wife died. Hey whatever, a man has NEEDS. David Vitter knows all about this. [Monroe News-Star/Fox News]

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