My mother used to have an expression: when you're at the disco, the whole world looks gay. So when anonymous people start reporting they've seen White House Chief Pressbot Scott McClellan in a gay bar -- in March of 1995, even, and in Texas -- well, in light of current events, let's just say y'all are seeing a mirage of homos everywhere. A fine mist of homosexuality is coating your lenses. Seriously, it's like fucking 1989 out here on the internets.
Besides: it's not like a little sex with other men would make him gay anyway. —C.S.