Deleted Comments Of The Day: Liberal Veterans Are Fictional Edition
As we all know, the greatest scandal of the gummint shutdown is Barack Obama's 9/11/Pearl Harbor sneak attack on America's World War II vets, whereby he personally endorsed Hitler byclosing the WWII Memorial on the National Mall (although the memorial is now open to vets only). Not surprisingly, we got a few comments from new visitors about our story, and they were None Too Pleased. Consider this note from "ORDINARYPATRIOT," who used up all their available capslock while typing their username:
you spineless left wing POS! You had better hope that a miracle happens and you one day are half the man that these men are. If not for them you'd be speaking German and saluting pictures of the Fuhrer. Please leave this country, moron.
Kind of takes you right back to watching All in the Family on a 13-inch Sony Trinitron, don't it, meathead? Love it or leave it!
We received eleventy comments from "Gaius_Gracchuss" (ooh, username refers to a Roman reformer -- misspelled -- here's a scholar who read Ender's Game), who resents any comparison between the WWII vets who trespassed and the Occupy Wall Street hippies who also trespassed:
These troublemakers risked their lives to protect this country. OWS wants to destroy this country. These men and women did not attack the police. OWS did attack the police. Accuracy is not your strong suite.
Elsewhere, "Gaius_Gracchuss" replied to another commenter by informing them that "history is not your strong suite" while explaining that WWII vets "agreed to die if necessary to protect this country," a fact that most people are probably unaware of. And in another comment, "Gaius" makes it clear that for our system to work, it is absolutely necessary that the Republicans shut it down:
You do know that we have a representative government and that the job of the opposition is to oppose? Ah well you guys never did like the constitution or the built in checks on the imperial power of the Obama administration did you. So your comment is understandable from your totalitarian point of view.
What good is an opposition that doesn't oppose? It would probably be unconstitutional for the Republicans to let the government stay open because of this. But all in all, "Gaius_Gracchuss" is quite excited that this whole fuck-tussle will "wake up" Americans in time for the next election that's coming up: "Can't wait till 2012/2014."
We guess maybe chronology is not his strong suite.
We also heard from "Libtards_suck," who set us straight on why the House had to shut down the government:
Wow, you people really are out of touch with reality. If the Senate had actually done THEIR job over the last five years and passed a budget there wouldn't be a need for the never ending Continuing Resolutions to fund the government. The government has been shut down 18 times now since 1976 and we're still here. Quit sensationalizing and inflating the issue. I can't wait until the bottom falls out and you start whining "How did THAT happen?" TIme to go, I have to drop Obama off at the Oval Orifice.
Hey, that's pretty funny! "Office" and "Orifice" do sound a lot like each other! Also, government shutdowns are no big deal, because they've happened before, so stop worrying over nothing. Also, the bottom is going to drop out someday, and you people will have no idea what to do.
Seldom have we seen such a cogent analysis of the modern political landscape. Thank you.
Our follow-up story on the WWII monument elicited some serious butthurt from "justadude2010," who would just like you people to stop suggesting that Michele Bachmann and other teabagger congresscritters are engaged in any political theater at the WWII Memorial:
I'm a veteran (served active duty in the Marine Corps and Army). I also served as a police officer for years. So I think that qualifies me as a "veteran", many times over. And I don't like Liberals or Obama, at all. Furthermore, I have many (numbering in the thousands) of friends in or formerly in the armed forces, and current and former police officers. And I don't know a single military veteran or police officer who likes Obama, or who supports Liberals. I think that's pretty telling. So when I see Liberals talking about people using us veterans as "pawns", I realize they don't know what they're talking about. I don't get used as a pawn, I simply hate Liberals.
Of the "thousands" of military friends he has (can he name more than a few hundred of them, we wonder?), there is not a single liberal. Veterans who read Wonkette, we believe you may have just been called fictional. We think that's pretty telling. Also, if the WWII vets visiting the memorial are happy to serve as a backdrop, can they really be pawns? We like these existential questions.
"Justadude2010" also wants you to know that, as liberals, you people are not Real Americans, and are hence not entitled to use the first-person plural when speaking of American things. This, apparently, came in response to a comment by Edgydrifter, who asked how it was that so many members of the Tea Party Caucus "just happened to be at the WWII monument at the right moment to witness this abuse of our cherished veterans?" WELL! That was pretty nervy, you darn liberal!
Um, I'm a veteran, and I in no way support Liberals. I don't want you to "cherish" me, and I don't belong to you in any way. I am not one of "your veterans". Thanks, but no thanks.
You don't own him! Don't you go thinking that this country or its Brave Fighting Men are "yours," OK? Thousands of Justadude's close personal friends know better. Also, figurative language is bad for America.
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.