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Looks like it's time for another trip to the ol' comment queue, that purgatory where comments submitted by new users must cool off until we deem them worthy of inclusion in the Wonkette Community (bribery can help). Our first missive comes from "Sam_Gavurin," who was not at all pleased with our story about fake "War On Christmas" stories. Sam_Gavurin sent two important messages, the first being an all-caps "C H MERRY I S T M A S ! !" which we think may be some kind of concrete poem or something. The second made his point a bit more explicitly:


If you miserable "Politically Correct " killjoys want to abstain from CHRISTMAS, that's fine with me! But DO NOT ruin CHRISTMAS for the rest of us. If you killjoys hate CHRISTMAS so much, move to a communist country, and leave us alone! MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Since neither of the items in the actual story actually involved anyone attempting to ruin, abolish, or otherwise harm Christmas -- except maybe the fascists of Orange County who don't allow Christmas lights strung across a public road, because zoning/safety -- we will have to assume that Sam_Gavurin just wanted to drop by and remind us of our holiday travel options. And a cheery Festivus to you, too, Sam_Gavurin!

Our story about Sarah Palin's flawless victory over Martin Bashir, who had to resign because he said something about dookies, was not appreciated by "allhailpalin," whose username suggests they are a big fan of that fellow who does the travel documentaries. Or maybe it was the comments they didn't care for, since allhailpalin writes (all comments copied verbatim)

a lot of shit lovers on here ,childlike

and

what kind of "adults" sit around talking about shit my kids stopped when they were about 5 or 6 on national tv at that

We are indeed impressed that allhailpalin got their kids on national TV, although we don't think we'd actually watch a program in which children talk about shit and then stop. Is this on one of those niche cable networks like BMTV or the PooperStation?

We also got a reminder to watch our language from one "rgolden" in response to our piece on Barack Obama's lying lies about his uncle, which as we recall was pretty free of naughty words anyway; maybe you terrible people and your terrible cussy comments just drove them to distraction:

When did people start talking this way like it's normal? I don't get it. "punch" "bitch" :"shit down her throat" -- people these days like to sound like absolute trash. I don't get that. Since when did trashy become cool? Gross.

We could launch into a brief discussion of the place of creative obscenity in a flourishing democratic culture, touching on such landmarks as Lenny Bruce and the Berkeley Free Speech Movement, and making reference to such masters of bawdy as Shakespeare and Mark Twain, but fuck it.

"Simonzee1" added this comment to a post about scary gay adoptive parents -- the story had nothing to do with either Barack Obama or Nelson Mandela, but it ran on the day Mandela died, so close enough.

Obama would know nothing of taking on the weight of a nation through personal suffering and sacrifice like Mandela. This is the difference between a construct of the left and the real world. Obama and his pre-fab self are a creation of Hollwood along with his values as he admitted himself. When will the left just admitt that these constructs and creations to cater for the cult of personality and their politically correct religion are dangerous duds as they seek to establish their own flailing legacy. Martin Luther King and Mandela had soul because they were not tools and stooges of the left. The left just rallied around them and smothered them as trophies. A bit like like they "pretend" to speak for and represent the bests interests of blacks or Latinos or Hispanics. All trophies no action. Mandela and Martin Luther King belong to God not to illiberal leftist clowns in Hollwood and the media.

Simonzee1 felt pretty strongly about this, too -- enough to copypaste it, word for word, to six other websites. We have a feeling that he does not know much more about Martin Luther King or Nelson Mandela beyond the indisputable fact that both were conservative Republicans.

Our piece making fun of the CBS Fun In The Morning Programme for using Toto's "Africa" in a teaser for coverage of Nelson Mandela's funeral drew this reply from "MRsc831," who didn't have a problem with the song, but with our assumption that somebody at CBS was just incredibly lazy:

Isnt it wrong to put a black/white label on choice of song, especially when its linked to Mandela? I thought he was fighting exactly against this stereotypical behaviour, so this article really is kinda dumb. Besides, toto rocks! Mandela woulda dug it!!

OK, but isn't the point that there's, like, a lot of South African music that they could have used? Even so, we might actually be persuaded not to delete MRsc831, depending on what you guys think. (We should totally add a "give us Barabbas" poll to this feature, don'tcha think?)

And finally, Yr Editrix's piece Tuesday -- about what appeared to be Michelle Obama's epic side-eye at her husband taking selfies with some cheesy Danish -- got a little bit of blowback, possibly because Rebecca is Strom Thurmond or something. "Zin88" found the headline problematic:

Michelle is pissed "Y'all"? "Y'all"? "Y'all"? Melanin tells you everything you think you need to know about the way someone speaks? "Y'all"? No.

And "Stopignorance1" had far more to say on the matter about how Rebecca did a racism:

Rebecca Schoenkopf, you ignorant racist bitchslut. Michelle Obama is not "...Pissed 'Y'all' ". Neither the President nor the First Lady is interested or concerned about "Tall, blonde and 'pretty' ". The President was surrounded by "Tall, blonde and allegedly 'pretty' " at Occidental, Columbia and Harvard as well as on countless Hawaiian beaches yet he chose Tall, BLACK, gorgeous and intelligent. Despite your fantasies that the President will ditch Michelle and put "tall, blonde and allegedly pretty" in the role of First Lady that will never happen. "Tall, blonde and allegedly pretty", something that I am sure you are not, is irrelevant to the President so slither back to the irrelevancy that you are and continue to be envious of Michelle Obama, power, intelligence and beauty. The President does not want Tall, blonde and allegedly pretty, so there is no one through whom you can live vicariously, imagining yourself as Obama's side chick, so don't flatter yourself.

"Y'all" = unspeakable. "Bitchslut" = just speaking truth to a racist who has sick fantasies about replacing the FLOTUS with an allegedly pretty blonde from one of those bork-bork-bork Swedish Chef countries. In any case, Rebecca will now go stand in her Privilege Corner.

Now, if we can just figure out a way to arrange for Stopignorance1 and Zin88 to meet MRsc831 for an afternoon of coffee and music appreciation....

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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