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History's Greatest Monster, 2016 Edition


This Donald Trump guy has finally found a way to win with women: By insisting he's winning with women, and that Hillary Clinton, who's spent a career being accused of being a man-hating radical feminist lesbian, is actually a "nasty, mean enabler," and the worst abuser of women ever. You see, she's simultaneously only popular with women because she has a clam, AND she should be despised because she smiled on Bill's sexual harassment and then destroyed all the women she helped him rape. We think that's what he's getting at, at least; it's so incoherent that it's difficult to untangle.

At a rally in Oregon on Friday night, Trump accused Hillary Clinton of trying to “destroy the lives” of her husband’s accusers. “She was an unbelievably nasty, mean enabler, and what she did to a lot of those women is disgraceful,” he thundered, offering no evidence. He repeated the same charges the next day in Washington state.

Silly us, we thought she couldn't be raping and pillaging all those women, because she is too busy with MURDER. But if you want something done, ask a busy person!

As Rachel Maddow explained Monday, Trump's taking his cues from a conspiracy theory book co-written by his best bud and unofficial advisor Roger Stone (who's also working on a book explaining how the Clintons murdered JFK Jr.) and by freaky-deaky Texas bedbug Robert Morrow, who also says Bill isn't Chelsea's dad. It makes a little more sense when Rachel explains it, but not much:

So yes, Trump is using only the best, most high-quality sources. Stone, to help publicize Hillary's crimes against women, has hired Kathleen Willey, one of Bill Clinton's accusers from the '90s, as the head of a group originally called "Women Against Hillary." Maybe someone pointed out that a group called "WAH" wouldn't get the kind of attention Stone wanted, because in January the group was rechristened with the much catchier monicker "Rape Accountability Project for Education PAC." Yes, that's RAPE PAC. Get it? Stone has also promised to run an "all-woman Swift Boat operation" against Hillary. Because, you know, Roger Stone and Donald Trump care about women so much, and want to protect the dear little ladies from Hillary and her campaign of rape, plus sometimes murder. So get ready for the whole cast of women who were supposedly victimized by the Bill and Hillary rape team to resurface, singing the praises of Donald Trump.

Even though Donald Trump is now the greatest friend women ever had, and the professional Clinton victims are signing on to his campaign, you will be simply astonished to learn that Trump had some very different things to say about them in the late '90s. The Daily Beast found a transcript of Trump explaining on Fox News in 1998 that Bill Clinton was being unjustly accused by a bunch of very unattractive women. (Net worth and beauty are the only standards by which Trump can rank women, after all; ideally, a gal should be rich and beautiful.) He simply couldn't get over what a bunch of Uglies those broads were:

“The whole thing, it’s just so unattractive,” the orange-hued demagogue told host Neil Cavuto, according to transcripts. “Linda Tripp may be one of the most unattractive human beings I’ve ever seen -- not women, human beings. She’s just an unattractive person. This [Lucianne] Goldberg person, her agent or whatever she is, is just a terrible woman. You look at Paula Jones, I mean the whole cast of characters.”

He added: “It’s like it’s from Hell. It’s a terrible group of people.”

Seconds later, Trump felt the need to reiterate his obsession with their appearance. “The whole group, it’s truly an unattractive cast of characters -- Linda Tripp, Lucianne Goldberg -- I mean, this woman -- I watch her on television, just vomiting. She is so bad. The whole group -- Paula Jones, Lewinsky -- it’s just a really unattractive group.

“And I’m not just talking about physical, but I am also talking about physical.”

He did at least acknowledge that maybe Clinton's accusers could be tolerable if they weren't so butt-ugly: If they looked like supermodels, he added, they "would be more pleasant to watch." Thank goodness they've either gotten better looking, or at least more useful to him, in time to help him smear Hillary as a monster who ruined women's lives.

Weird how she didn't simply kill them like she did the other hundred or so victims she and Bill racked up.

[Guardian / MSNBC / Daily Beast]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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