The good folks at Michelle Malkin's Home for Aggrieved Aggregators have made a shocking discovery! House Republicans did not shut down the park service, and in particular did not shut down theWorld War II Memorial on the National Mall. Turns out the orders to shut out WWII vets came directly from Barack Obama himself! And they have statements from a Park Service spokeslady, even:

Stephen Hayes @stephenfhayes: At the WWII Memorial, Carol Johnson w/the Park Service says they were told to close the site by White House's Office of Management & Budget.

Kathleen McKinley @KatMcKinley: There it is. The White House Office of Management & Budget ordered the closing of the WWII Memorial. Disgusting.

Yep, there it is. Harry Reid can point his grotesque fingers at the GOP all he wants, but the order to close the World War II Memorial reportedly came straight from the executive branch.

We would like to congratulate the Twitchers for their sleuthing. Never mind that it's Congress's job to ensure that government is funded -- once the money was no longer authorized, it was indeed the Office of Management and Budget (which manages federal facilities) that told the Park Service to shut down parks and monuments in DC, doubtless because Barack Obama Hates America's Troops.

Basically, the whole article is a collection of tweets from different people repeating that monuments in DC were ordered closed by the OMB, with ominous explanations like this:

The OMB, or Office of Management and Budget is part of the executive branch and reports directly to President Obama


Confirmed: Those barricades are Barry-cades.

Ah, but that's not all! Since there was suddenly a large crowd, accompanied by members of the Congressional Tea Party Caucus, showing up at the World War II Memorial, the OMB authorized Park Police to be on hand (you know, rather than just walk away from the situation altogether, the way things should work in a modern civilization). That brought us this insight:

Not only did the order to keep World War II veterans away from their memorial come from the top, but Park Service employees have been “excepted” from the furlough to make it happen.

Happily, Michele Bachmann was on hand to be photographed with all the WWII vets, and she made a solemn vow:

"President Obama and Harry Reid wanted the government to shut down, so they could say ‘Look at those evil Republicans, they want this to happen.’ ... [but we] aren’t going to let these World War II veterans be used as political pawns."

For the moment, the circus at the WW II Memorial may be cooled somewhat by a bit of administrative legerdemain that some unidentified smart person came up with:

United States Park Police announced that planned Honor Flight visits to the monument are considered “First Amendment activities,” which are allowed regardless of the government’s operating status.

Stars And Stripes reporter Leo Shane III tweeted earlier today that this distinction has already been put into effect, with Honor Flight veterans being admitted to the Memorial while non-vet tourists trying to go past the barricades were turned away.

So ... is that that then? Not bloody likely! Remember, before today, history's greatest tragedy was the time Barack Nobummer ordered the sequester so he could keep all the white tourists (whom he hates) out of the White House, because of how it is the Black House now, the end.

[Twitchy / Slate / Stars and Stripes / photo credit Leo Shane III, Twitter]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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Gentle flowers of love, our darlings, the ones who make us whole, who let us hire writers at a living wage, who keep us going through the Trumpenstorm, who complete us: Move on down to the comments for open thread, your work today is done! The rest of you, the ones who have been meaning to get your credit card or your paypal password for lo these SEVEN or FOURTEEN YEARS NOW, YOU:

Hi! I'm Rebecca. Have we met yet? We HAVE? Because you've been coming twice a week or four times a day for us to guide you through our fascist horror, together? Sweet! Barring you really ain't got none, we would like your money.

But you always need money, you are hissing through your beardo crumbs. Well, yes! That is how food and rent/mortgages and paychecks and servers work. As the lucky-ducky federal workers have discovered, you have to pay for them on an ongoing basis. And you know who likes food and mortgages and paychecks and servers? It is your Wonkette!

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Do we really have to write two posts in a row that feature Oleg Deripaska, whose face is really weird looking and stupid and we hate looking at it? Yes. Apparently we do.

OK, so we were just talking about how Deripaska is getting a sweet free handjob from Steven Mnuchin's Treasury Department with the deal to lift sanctions off his companies. We also know that Deripaska is Paul Manafort's former boss, to whom Manafort was in serious debt, and to whom Manafort weirdly offered secret briefings on the Trump camapign, as a way to "get whole." (We still don't know what exactly that means, or how involved Deripaska was in the Russian conspiracy to ratfuck the election and install Trump in office, but we bet Robert Mueller does.)

But another wang of the Deripaska story we've learned over the past couple of years involves a woman named Anastasia Vashukevich, AKA Nastya Rybka, an escort who traveled with Deripaska on his yacht, and who once claimed to have recordings of Deripaska on his yacht discussing the plan to skullfuck America's democratic presidential election, presumably because Russians never really have understood how democracy is supposed to work, and also because they wanted to steal the American presidency to use it for their own benefit.

Don't know if you've been following the latest news -- that Rybka was suddenly released from the Thai prison where she had been bizarrely detained, that she was assured she would be able to safely go home to Belarus, and that she was immediately arrested while changing planes in Russia -- but she's free now. Or, you know, "free."

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